Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Around the world, formal learning in primary schools has become a widely debated topic in recent years. A minority of people believe that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. From my perspective, I am in favor of this statement. In addition, it is very important for children to play and learn in the primary school classrooms.

First and foremost, primary schools place great emphasis on formal learning because it provides strong foundation for their future education, which has a positive influence on the students' ability. Moreover, students who attend classes and take lessons on regular basis can improve their knowledge and achieve better academic results. For example, when teacher takes a test on a daily basis it enhances students' writing and learning skills. They are able to compete the other classmates.

On the other hand, it is very necessary to students learn lesson as well as play a wide variety of games. These activities encourage the critical thinking and enhance children's problem-solving skills. For instance, children can participate in a wide variety of indoor and outdoor games, including football, badminton, and cricket. these games encourage team work and communication skills.

In conclusion, I largely agree that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal learning. I believe that a balance between academic learning and play is essential because it helps children achieve both educational success and overall development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, expressing a clear position and discussing the importance of play. However, the essay is under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of the arguments. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped. For instance, the point about 'daily tests' is a narrow example of formal learning and could have been expanded to discuss the broader curriculum. To reach a higher band, you need to provide more detailed explanations and examples to fully explore the implications of your arguments, ensuring you meet the length requirement to allow for sufficient development.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use basic cohesive devices like 'First and foremost', 'Moreover', and 'On the other hand' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'They are able to compete the other classmates', where the connection to the previous point is slightly disjointed. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next to create a more cohesive argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'formal learning', 'academic results', and 'critical thinking'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are minor inaccuracies in collocation, such as 'compete the other classmates' (should be 'compete with'). To achieve a higher score, aim to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary and idiomatic expressions related to education and child development, while ensuring that your word choices are precise and contextually appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('provides strong foundation', 'to students learn lesson') and minor punctuation issues. Some sentences are slightly awkward, which occasionally impacts the fluency of the text. To improve, focus on mastering article usage and subject-verb agreement. Additionally, try to incorporate a wider variety of complex sentence structures, such as conditional sentences or relative clauses, while ensuring they are used accurately to support your arguments.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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