Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many individuals advocate that primary schools focused more on formal learnings. I agree with that because it is a prime time to educate them and clear basic concepts of studies. It is essential for children to play and do studies so that they can adapt new things quickly in the classroom.

Although, in the beganing of the learning process for children, the primary school teachers start introducing formal concepts so that pupil start developing the basic methods. Therefore, if their basics are not clear then they have to suffer for their whole lifetime studies. Furthermore, students who adapts this things in the starting feels more confident and less confused about further studies. For instance, in USA primary schools teacher start teaching the number counts and sum of number so that students have clear and the simple methods of mathematics.

Studying and playing is a crucial part for the primary students, due to their first steps for their future and they have to develop many new things in it. On the contrary, at this stage games make children to be active and physicaly fit. Moreover, it plays important roll for their mental health and help them to learning and educating languages and various subjects. If It works together that plays a significant roll to educate them in classroom. For instance, in Canada many primary school start introdusing activities where game and learnings are combine together and improve their learning process and gather children more interest.

In conclusion, many individuals advocate that primary schools focus more on formal studies. I agree with that because it helps students to clear their basic concepts of studies. Therefore, playing and studies play a significant roll in primary schools classroom.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you state your position, the arguments are repetitive and lack depth. For instance, the explanation of why formal learning is essential is quite brief, and the connection between play and academic success is asserted rather than fully explored. To improve, ensure that each paragraph provides a clear, distinct supporting point with a more detailed explanation or a more specific example to demonstrate your reasoning more thoroughly.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'On the contrary', and 'In conclusion'. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. Some sentences feel disconnected, and the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'if it works together that plays a significant roll'. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices more naturally and ensure that each sentence flows smoothly into the next to create a more cohesive argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of word-choice errors and spelling mistakes, such as 'roll' instead of 'role', 'beganing' instead of 'beginning', and 'adapts this things'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'studies' and 'things'. To improve, try to incorporate more academic collocations and precise terminology related to education, and pay closer attention to spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('students who adapts', 'teacher start teaching') and tense inconsistencies ('primary schools focused'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally understandable, these recurring errors prevent the writing from reaching a higher level of accuracy. Focusing on basic subject-verb agreement and consistent verb tenses will significantly improve the quality of your writing.

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