Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There's an ongoing debate whether primary schools only focuses on formal learning and they should allow children to play as well as learn in the classroom. i strongly believe that children should encouraged to learn while playing since it leads them to became physically stronger and also develop cognitive nature.

The major advantage of this approach is that children are able to attend lectures without getting exhausted and stressed.Playing games while studying plays an important role in students life because engaged minds learnt concept quickly and also understands the concept more deeply rather than just learning the topic theoretically.

This technique of learning also encourage learners develop cognitive nature and skills, this results to acquire and store information for a long run. Moreover, it is beneficial for students who usually lack interest in studies. Additionally, children are able to develop more interest towards studies for instance, solving mathematical problems while playing puzzles helps them strengthen their minds and enables them to learn multiple techniques. For example, in many developing countries like Germany and Ireland more focuses on outdoor activities and practical skills so that children should not feel bored

In conclusion, i firmly believe that primary schools should not only focuses on traditional classes they must organize activities which are advantageous for students so that they develop improved skills and allow them to develop all-rounder personality. Since, primary classes syllabus are not lengthy that is why i believe they should more focus on developing inner personality or work on deep learning.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement and the importance of play in the classroom. The position is clear from the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention benefits like reduced stress and cognitive development, the supporting examples—such as the reference to Germany and Ireland—are vague and lack specific detail to fully substantiate your argument. To reach a higher band, ensure that your supporting points are more thoroughly explored with concrete explanations rather than just stating the benefits. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, but the overall depth of the argument remains at a mid-level.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. There is a clear progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'This technique of learning also encourage...' and 'Additionally, children are able to...'. Some transitions feel repetitive, and the referencing is occasionally unclear. While the paragraphing is sufficient, the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents to improve the overall cohesion of the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some relevant terms like 'cognitive nature', 'theoretically', and 'all-rounder personality'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'develop cognitive nature' (should be 'develop cognitive skills') and 'results to acquire' (should be 'results in the acquisition of'). The range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic vocabulary. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and academic vocabulary to express your ideas with greater sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('primary schools only focuses', 'primary classes syllabus are'), missing articles, and incorrect verb forms ('should encouraged', 'learnt concept'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing after commas and periods. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. You should focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring consistent use of articles and verb tenses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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