Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In contemporary days, Elementary schools plays significant role in children's education as well as personal development. It is often argued by many individual that primary schools give much importance to on formal learning and not organise such kind of events that plays crucial role in children's physical as well as mental health. I firmly believe that institutions are responsible for pupil's personnel as well professional growth.

To begin with, schools only give attention to the course of children. they only are they not teaching the books for instance, academic stuff only provide date of pupils' course but they don't give relevant examples which are helpful to learners to learn the situations. so from that scholars only gain about theory knowledge but they lack practical experience which are beneficial for their future.

Moreover, professors only give information about education in elementary school but not provide physical exercise time and not organise the such kind of activities like yoga, sports events, art competition.so it leads to the students are weak in physical performance as well as mentally. For example, if children only learn about maths, sciences and other subjects and not involve in any physical activities they are more prone to such kind of diseases like diabetes, obesity.so it is disadvantageous for pupils to not to be part of excercise.

To sum up, I think it is significant for children to play as well as learn in elementary school classroom as they provide benefits for physical as well as mental health and it leads to educational and personal growth which are helpful in their future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you argue that schools focus too much on theory, the explanation remains repetitive, focusing primarily on the health consequences of inactivity rather than exploring the pedagogical benefits of play. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments lack depth and specific examples from your own experience, which would have strengthened the response. To improve, ensure each paragraph introduces a distinct, well-developed point that directly answers the specific questions posed in the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a basic attempt at using cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'To sum up'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between 'academic stuff' and 'practical experience' feels abrupt. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive, and the logical progression could be smoother if you used a wider variety of linking words to connect your ideas more naturally.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is somewhat limited and repetitive. You use basic terms like 'significant role', 'crucial role', and 'helpful' multiple times. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'contemporary days' (should be 'in contemporary times') and 'date of pupils' course' (which is unclear). While the meaning is generally conveyed, there is a lack of more sophisticated or precise vocabulary that would demonstrate a higher level of lexical control. Expanding your range of synonyms and collocations will help improve this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('Elementary schools plays'), article usage, and awkward phrasing ('not organise the such kind of activities'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing after periods and commas. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader. To reach a higher band, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and improving the accuracy of your sentence construction, particularly when attempting more complex ideas.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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