Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people argue that primary schools pay a great attention to traditional learning .I strongly agree because most of the schools prefer good grades over other activities like creativity and sportsmanship . It is very crucial for children to be involved in both playing and learning at early age of schooling.

To begin with, most of the primary school follows the traditional mode of learning.For instance, they focus on strict rule regulations, curriculum and availability of teachers. In primary schools, they primary goal of institutes are to make child capable of achieving good grades and following strict rules. however, it not only paralyzed students from creativity but also enable them to stick to grades only.Furthermore, students get bored from these rules and are less motivated in studies.

It is very efficient, to get children involved in other activities like sports, painting , drawing and creative art works because it not only arouse their interest in studies but also make them feel motivated that they are capable of many abilities. It also sharpen their mind.For example, a Child who is good at studies is also a Campion in sport . It sharpen or polished their abilities .

In conclusion, a Child should not be only limited to the strict formal learning at primary school but he should be get involved in other co curricular activities like playing, painting drawings.Because it not only improve his other abilities but also give him a kind of relaxation after heavy work load. So, I completely agree with this trend because it improves the overall well being of a Child from early age.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the argument that schools 'paralyzed students from creativity' is a strong claim that lacks specific, well-supported evidence or examples beyond general statements. While the response covers all requirements, the supporting points are somewhat repetitive and could benefit from more depth and nuance to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, maintaining a consistent stance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical, and there are issues with punctuation and spacing, such as missing spaces after periods (e.g., 'learning .I', 'rules. however'). Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the use of 'they' in 'they primary goal of institutes', which creates confusion. Improving the variety and precision of cohesive links would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'co-curricular activities' and 'formal learning'. However, there are several word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'paralyzed students from creativity' (instead of 'stifled') and 'Campion in sport' (likely meaning 'champion'). Spelling errors, such as 'Campion', and minor inaccuracies in word formation occur throughout. To improve, the student should focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring correct word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'most of the primary school follows', 'the primary goal of institutes are') and article usage errors (e.g., 'at early age', 'a Child'). Punctuation is inconsistent, particularly regarding capitalization and spacing after full stops. These errors are noticeable and occur throughout the text, though they do not prevent the reader from understanding the core message. A greater focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would be beneficial.

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