Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Education is the key to success. The quality education starts from the basic levels. No doubt eduaction makes the career. But physical activities also play a vital role in the development of children both mentally and physically.

Therefore, Both are equally important.

In most of the educational institutions only formal learning is focused too much. Just beacuse it is the requirement of parents and the system that the children must gets the good grades. For good grades more time is required for books and hoom work. Therefore, most of the activities in primary schools are also related to books, like quizes,assignments, projects and presentations. Due to all of this a children gets good grades in favourite subjects. Which is essential to promote in next class and to pass out with A+. Because schools admission policies are becoming. So parents prefer their child spend more time with books as compare to be involved in any sports.

On the other hand, Due to excess of class and home work children compromise their health both physically and mentally. As sports and such activities play a crucial part in the development of children. Because a physically fit body has a good brain in it. Due to different sports they learn discipline, time managment and team work. It prepares them for the hardships of life and make them strong. Every sport has its own beauty, rules and learnings. Which can not be learn by just studying books and watching their diagrams in the books. Therefore to make them physically and mentally strong sports are necesaary

No one can deny the importance of education but sports are also necessary for the betterment and improvement of the child. Both are essential for living. Education and sports are equally important.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding the focus on formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. For instance, the argument that sports teach 'discipline' and 'time management' is mentioned but not expanded upon with specific examples or evidence. While the response covers the requirements, the ideas remain at a general level, preventing it from reaching a higher band. To improve, you should provide more concrete examples or deeper analysis of how play specifically benefits primary school children beyond general health.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, starting sentences with 'Just beacuse' or 'Which is essential' creates fragmented, non-fluent transitions. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the link between sentences could be smoother. While the overall structure is coherent, the lack of sophisticated linking words and the occasional misuse of cohesive devices limit the score. Improving the variety of transition signals would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There is some repetition of basic terms like 'good grades', 'books', and 'important'. You attempt some topic-specific vocabulary such as 'educational institutions' and 'mentally and physically', but there are frequent errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'eduaction', 'hoom work', and 'quizes'. The phrasing is often simplistic, and there is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic collocations. To improve, focus on learning synonyms and more academic collocations related to education and child development.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in basic grammar, such as subject-verb agreement ('a children gets'), article usage, and sentence fragments ('Which is essential to promote...'). Punctuation is also problematic, with several run-on sentences and incorrect comma usage. While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and sentence construction prevent the writing from being considered error-free. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and verb would significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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