Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In this contemporary era, teaching every aspect of life to the children has become necessary. There is an on going debate that primary schools should focus more towards the formal learnings. I completely disagree to this statement, allowing children to do activities other than formal learning could be beneficial for them in many ways. The reasons supporting my disagreement will be discussed further in the essay.
It is very necessary for children to play along with learning in the primary school classroom. Firstly, allowing children to play will help them to reduce their stress. Young individual may sometimes become over burden due to academic learnings, play games in primary school will reduce their stress, and make them feel fresh resulting into increased concentration when they return to the studies. Secondly, small games apart from learning may teach children greater values and improve skills like teamwork and communication. Juveniles playing games in team may teach them leadership, teamwork and allow them to communicate with others. To illustrate this, in India teachers usually let children play classroom games such as word puzzles or problem solution by making teams in classroom, this teaches teamwork and communication to children.
Furthermore, playing games in classroom can aid children to to make newer friends and build stronger bond with their classmates. It also helps to increase the confidence of young ones. To exemplify, classroom games can create a friendly atmosphere for children who are extremely introvert and have fear of speaking in public, such games can allow them to interact with classmates and teachers which result into increase in their confidence and stronger bond with their friends. Moreover, interesting classroom games can facilitate creativity in young minds. Engaging activities other than formal learning can foster the imagination and creativity in young children. This creative ideas and imaginative powers can even result into innovations.
Taking everything into account, I completely disagree that school should only concerned with formal learning. playing games in primary school classroom should be encouraged as it allows children to freshen up and increase their concentration. Moreover, it fosters skills, values, creativity, and imagination in children, which is considered essential for their overall development and well-being
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
You have addressed both parts of the prompt: your stance on formal learning is clear, and you have provided sufficient reasons for the importance of play. The ideas are relevant and generally well-developed, particularly regarding stress reduction and social skills. However, the response could be improved by providing more nuanced examples. For instance, while you mention India, the description of 'problem solution' is a bit vague. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are fully extended with more specific, concrete evidence rather than relying on general statements about 'juveniles' or 'young individuals'. Overall, you have fulfilled the requirements of the task effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use a range of cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'Furthermore', and 'Taking everything into account' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as the phrase 'this teaches teamwork' where the antecedent is not perfectly clear. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that the flow between sentences is more natural and less reliant on standard list-like connectors.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'contemporary era', 'foster', and 'facilitate'. There are some instances of slightly unnatural collocations or word choices, such as 'formal learnings' (learning is typically uncountable) and 'over burden' (should be 'overburdened'). You also repeat certain words like 'classroom' and 'games' frequently. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and idiomatic expressions. For example, instead of repeating 'games', you could use 'recreational activities', 'interactive tasks', or 'play-based learning'. Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic collocations will enhance your writing style.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is a positive step. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'I completely disagree to this statement' (should be 'with'), 'Young individual' (should be plural), and 'result into' (should be 'result in'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation and article errors, such as 'the studies' (should be 'their studies'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and preposition usage to improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.