Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Some people believe that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. I partly agree with this opinion because academic education is important for children, but playing and other activities are equally necessary for their overall development.
Firstly, formal learning helps children develop basic skills that they need in their future education. Subjects such as mathematics, science, reading and writing provide children with essential knowledge. For example, if children learn basic mathematics at an early age, they can use these skills in their daily lives and in higher education. Therefore, schools should give enough time to academic subjects.
However, I believe that children should not spend the entire school day studying. Playing is also an important part of childhood because it helps children develop social and physical skills. When children play together, they learn how to communicate, cooperate and solve problems with others. Physical activities such as football, running and other outdoor games also keep children healthy and active. Moreover, playing can reduce stress and make children more interested in learning.
In my opinion, primary schools should create a proper balance between formal education and play. For instance, a school could have academic lessons in the morning and provide time for sports, games and creative activities in the afternoon. This would allow children to improve their academic knowledge while also developing their personality and physical abilities.
In conclusion, although formal learning is necessary in primary schools, I believe that too much focus on studies can be harmful. Children should be given sufficient opportunities to play because it contributes to their physical, social and mental development. A balanced approach would be the best way to prepare children for their future.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt clearly. You have taken a balanced position, arguing that while formal learning is essential, play is equally vital for holistic development. The ideas are relevant and well-supported with examples, such as the suggestion for a split-day schedule. To reach a higher band, you could further extend your ideas by discussing the long-term consequences of ignoring play, such as the impact on mental health or creativity, rather than just listing benefits. Overall, the response is well-focused and directly answers the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'However', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion' effectively to link your points. The paragraphing is appropriate and contributes to the overall clarity of the argument. To improve, you could vary your linking words slightly more to avoid a somewhat mechanical feel, but the current structure is effective and clear.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with precision. Phrases like 'overall development', 'holistic approach', and 'creative activities' are used correctly. However, the vocabulary is generally functional rather than sophisticated. To achieve a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more 'less common' lexical items or collocations that show a greater awareness of style. For example, instead of 'make children more interested', you could use 'foster a greater enthusiasm for learning'. The current range is adequate but lacks the flexibility required for higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. You use conditional sentences ('if children learn... they can use...') and complex structures effectively. The grammar is generally accurate, with very few errors that impede communication. Punctuation is used correctly throughout. To move into the higher bands, you should aim for a wider variety of complex structures, such as passive voice or more sophisticated subordinate clauses, and ensure that the majority of your sentences are error-free. Currently, your control is solid and reliable.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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