Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Recently, There is an ongoing debate among considerable proportion of individuals that the main attention of schools is on formal learning instead of focusing on improving their practical skills. Yes, I believe the same and I totally agree with the given statement.In addition to this, Playing is as much crucial as learning in primary school as it leads to a strong mind and body.
Schools focus too much on student's formal education, while it is very impressive but they should also give them practical skills which subsquently leads to a better job options and a secure future.For instance, In today's world many countries are facing the issue of unemployment as job markets want professional employees. It is due to the fact that Primary schools main attention is towards attendance, lectures, memorizing information, and exams, while they don't learn anything practical. From early age, they should be taken to labs for practical learning to improve their critical thinking and skills required in the industry.In a nutshell, practical learning should be introduced from beginning of schools.
Students should be encouraged to have fun activities in school with learning. Teachers should encourage students to participate in games and other activities as it leads to sound body and sharp mind. In addition to that, In schools special timing should be dedicated for students to play along with the learning
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, expressing a clear position on the focus of primary schools and the importance of play. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of the arguments. The ideas regarding 'practical skills' are somewhat repetitive and lack specific, well-developed examples. While the position is clear, the development is superficial, and the failure to meet the length requirement prevents a higher score. To improve, you must expand on your points with more detailed explanations and concrete examples to ensure you meet the word count and provide a more comprehensive response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is somewhat mechanical. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'In addition to this' and 'For instance', they are sometimes used incorrectly or in a way that feels forced. The transition between the discussion of formal learning and the importance of play is abrupt. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks the necessary flow to guide the reader smoothly through your arguments. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are some awkward collocations, such as 'considerable proportion of individuals' and 'playing is as much crucial'. You rely on basic vocabulary and struggle to incorporate less common lexical items effectively. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'subsquently' (spelling) and 'beginning of schools'. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to education and child development, and pay closer attention to word formation and spelling.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'Recently, There is', 'student's formal education' (should be plural), and 'Primary schools main attention'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the placement of commas and capital letters after periods. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors suggests a lack of control over complex structures. You should focus on subject-verb agreement, correct use of articles, and consistent punctuation to improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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