Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Primary education plays a crucial role in shaping children's academic and personal development. Some people believe that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal learning, leaving insufficient time for play. I largely agree with this view because young children need opportunities to develop social and practical skills, and play can make academic learning more effective.

One reason I agree is that excessive academic pressure can negatively affect young children's motivation and well-being. Primary school pupils are still developing emotionally and socially, so expecting them to spend most of the day completing worksheets, memorising information, and preparing for tests can make learning stressful. For example, children who have a timetable filled with lessons and homework may become bored and lose their natural curiosity. If schools reduced excessive academic pressure and provided regular opportunities for play, children would probably become more enthusiastic about learning.

Play is also extremely important because it develops skills that cannot always be acquired through formal lessons. During games, children learn how to cooperate, communicate, solve problems, and deal with both success and failure. Physical activities also improve fitness and concentration, which can benefit academic performance. For instance, a group game in which children have to work together to achieve a common goal can teach teamwork more effectively than a textbook exercise. If teachers combine educational activities with carefully planned games, children can learn important academic concepts while developing essential social skills.

However, this does not mean that formal education should be reduced dramatically. Children still need to develop basic abilities in reading, writing, mathematics, and science. The most effective approach is therefore to achieve a balance between structured learning and play rather than prioritising one over the other.

In conclusion, I agree that primary schools can sometimes place excessive emphasis on formal education. Play is equally important because it supports children's social, physical, emotional, and cognitive development. If schools create a balanced learning environment, children will be more likely to enjoy education while developing the skills they need for later life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response fully addresses both parts of the prompt. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout the essay. The ideas regarding the negative impact of academic pressure and the developmental benefits of play are well-developed and supported with relevant examples, such as the comparison between textbook exercises and group games. The argument is balanced, as you acknowledge the necessity of formal education while advocating for a more integrated approach. The response is well-structured and directly answers the 'to what extent' and 'how important' components of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the critique of formal learning and the importance of play is smooth. You use a range of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'One reason I agree', 'For instance', and 'The most effective approach is therefore'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The flow of information is natural, and the relationship between ideas is consistently clear throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary that is appropriate for an academic context. Phrases like 'academic and personal development', 'natural curiosity', and 'cognitive development' show a solid command of topic-specific language. The word choice is generally precise, and you avoid repetition. While the vocabulary is accurate and fits the context well, it could be elevated further by incorporating more sophisticated collocations or less common academic synonyms to reach the highest band levels. Overall, the lexical range is sufficient to convey your ideas with clarity and precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The essay displays a good variety of complex sentence structures, such as conditional sentences ('If schools reduced...', 'If teachers combine...') and subordinate clauses. The grammar is highly accurate, with the majority of sentences being error-free. Punctuation is used correctly to support the clarity of your arguments. There are no significant grammatical errors that impede communication. The control over complex structures is consistent, and the writing style is formal and appropriate for an academic task.

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