Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Some people argue that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal academic learning. I largely agree with this view because excessive focus on classroom instruction may limit children's overall development. I also believe that play is an essential part of primary education, as it supports both cognitive and social growth.

Formal learning undoubtedly provides children with fundamental skills such as reading, writing and mathematics. These subjects form the basis of future education and should therefore remain a central part of the primary school curriculum. However, if schools concentrate almost exclusively on academic achievement, children may experience unnecessary pressure at an early age. In addition, opportunities to develop creativity, communication and problem-solving skills can be reduced when lessons are dominated by textbooks and examinations.

Play is equally important because it contributes to children's emotional, physical and intellectual development. Through games and group activities, young learners develop teamwork, confidence and the ability to resolve conflicts. Furthermore, educational play can make learning more enjoyable and memorable. For example, children often understand mathematical concepts more effectively through hands-on activities and educational games than through traditional lectures alone. As a result, they are more likely to remain motivated and engaged in the classroom.

In conclusion, although formal learning is essential in primary education, I believe that many schools place too much emphasis on academic study. A balanced approach that combines structured learning with meaningful play is the most effective way to support children's overall development and prepare them for future success.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt clearly, maintaining a consistent position throughout. The ideas regarding the drawbacks of excessive formal learning and the benefits of play are relevant and well-supported. However, the response is slightly under the 250-word minimum requirement (247 words). While the content is well-developed, this minor failure to meet the length constraint necessitates a slight penalty in this criterion, as the task instructions were not fully satisfied.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the focus on formal learning and the benefits of play is smooth. Cohesive devices such as 'However,' 'In addition,' and 'Furthermore' are used effectively to guide the reader. The progression of ideas is logical, and the paragraphing is appropriate for an academic essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is accurate and appropriate for the academic context. The student uses a good range of topic-specific language, such as 'cognitive and social growth,' 'fundamental skills,' and 'structured learning.' The word choices are precise, and there are no instances where vocabulary limitations impede communication. While the range is sufficient and natural, it could be further enhanced by incorporating more sophisticated, less common collocations to reach the highest band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The essay demonstrates a good command of grammatical structures. There is a mix of simple and complex sentences, such as the conditional structure 'if schools concentrate... children may experience...' and the use of participial phrases. The grammar is highly accurate, with no significant errors that hinder understanding. Punctuation is used correctly throughout. To achieve a higher score, the student could experiment with a wider variety of complex sentence patterns and more advanced syntactic structures.

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