Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-15
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
It is often argued that primary educational institutions put more emphasis on traditional way of learning and i completely agree with this opinion because they think it is the most effective way of education. However, it is also important for schools to incorporate extracurricular activities beside education as it significantly improves children's social, physical and cognitive development.
Primary schools consider the conventional way of education impactful as it requires students to engage in studies and give full attention to syllabus for getting good grades in examinations. There is no doubt that, formal learning builds the fundamental knowledge which is important for their future but sometimes too much educational pressure breaks their confidence and hampers creativity. For example, primary schools in Bangladesh, encourage students to memorize paragraphs even if they do not understand the meaning behind it because they believe the more they memorize, the better their grades would be.
Nevertheless, i strongly believe it is necessary for schools to incorporate games and extracurricular activities alongside studies because it would dramatically increase their psychological and social skills. Moreover, playing is another form of exercise and so it would keep kids fit as well. Playing games and doing activities outside classrooms would teach them not only team work, collaboration, communication and conflict management but also how to make new friends. Through this process they learn discipline, social skills and confidence that traditional learning methods cannot teach. For instance, primary schools that blend playing with learning, observe smarter and more outgoing students who do tremendously well in the future compared to those institutions that do no do it.
In conclusion, although conventional learning method is important for fundamental growth, too much focus on this can be problematic and therefore, it is important for primary schools to include playing games and extracurricular activities with learning to bring interactivity in classroom as its inevitably connected to a child's mental, physical and social growth.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt clearly. You have taken a firm position on the over-emphasis of formal learning and provided a well-reasoned argument for the importance of play. The ideas are relevant and supported by examples, such as the mention of rote memorization in Bangladesh and the benefits of teamwork. To reach a higher band, ensure that the development of ideas is more balanced; while the second paragraph is strong, the discussion on the 'importance' of play could be further extended by exploring specific types of play or developmental milestones to provide more depth.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'However', 'Nevertheless', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader through your argument. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the two main points of the prompt. To improve, ensure that referencing is always precise; for example, in the final paragraph, 'its inevitably connected' is slightly ambiguous in its reference. Additionally, some transitions could be more sophisticated to avoid a slightly mechanical feel.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas with precision. Phrases like 'extracurricular activities', 'cognitive development', and 'fundamental knowledge' are used appropriately. There are some minor issues with word choice, such as 'traditional way of learning' (should be 'traditional ways' or 'a traditional approach') and 'do no do it' (a minor slip). To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more idiomatic expressions or less common collocations to show greater flexibility and control over your lexical choices.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. You show good control over complex sentences, such as 'For instance, primary schools that blend playing with learning, observe smarter and more outgoing students...'. However, there are persistent minor errors, such as the lack of capitalization for the pronoun 'i', missing articles (e.g., 'alongside studies'), and occasional punctuation slips. While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the essay from reaching the higher bands where the majority of sentences must be error-free.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.