Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is extensively acknowledged that several education organisations try to focus more in studies. Playing games plays a significant role in learning studies. In my prespective games also considered as a subject not any waste of time and reason for my inclination are glanced in ensuing paragraphs.

To commence, with formal studies also important to learn different languages and subjects like maths and english however, sports also vital to maintain health and our physique. Moreover, in this modern era education is not only the major door to achieve success or goals there are numerous examples world wide who gain success in other fields instead of choosing path of education and they live their happily .For example, Christiano Ronaldo is a famous football player in foreign country and also spread out in own nation also he never get a cahnce to go school due to financial crises but since childhood he had interest in football and over the period of time he chooose his interest as a carrer and at present he is a successful player along with around 40 Million dollors Net Worth. Hence, education is crucial but not pressure children to over study.

Furthermore, games also make easy for learner to learn any subject. In addition, if any children learn anything while playing he learn more faster as compare to normal studying also it when playing the memory stores in long term memory. Thus, games make education effortless for children.

Agglomerating aforementioned points it can be concluded that games are not only souce of success also it make students more attentive while studying

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development is inconsistent. While you provide a relevant example (Cristiano Ronaldo), the argument regarding the balance between formal study and play is somewhat superficial. The position is clear, but the ideas are not fully extended. For instance, the link between play and long-term memory is mentioned but lacks depth or specific explanation. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph provides a more detailed analysis of the 'how' and 'why' rather than just stating the benefits.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'Agglomerating aforementioned points'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the internal structure of the paragraphs needs more sophisticated linking to ensure that the relationship between ideas is always transparent to the reader.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice, such as 'education organisations try to focus more in studies' and 'spread out in own nation'. You attempt some less common vocabulary, but it is often used inaccurately. Spelling errors, such as 'prespective', 'cahnce', 'carrer', and 'souce', are present. To improve, focus on learning collocations and ensuring that words are used in their correct context rather than relying on basic vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('games also considered', 'he learn more faster'), article usage, and sentence fragments. Some sentences are difficult to follow due to these errors, such as 'if any children learn anything while playing he learn more faster as compare to normal studying'. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent verb tenses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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