Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some individuals say that primary schools should reduce time on formal learing and give more focus on pratical activities and I completely agree with this statement.

In primary schools teachers more focus on formal learing instead of pratical things.To being with, one of most important reasons why schools staff should more focus on pratical activities because it become students more creative and children brain work more faster. When students work together they can learn teamwork and they can communicate with each other perfectly. Activities such as art,sports and group projects make them more engaging. Participate in sports is benifical for students overall health such as it improve their body strength and make them strong , also improve their focusing skills and improve thinking abilities.

Furthermore., another significant reason why school reducing formal learing that it can lower academic pressure from young students. Young children

may become stressed with excessive homework. Reducing formal learning may play vital role in their mental health. Students learn freely. Moreover, balancing between study and practical work may give more chance to grow students in their interested field such as some students are bad in academics but they are good in sports, so they have a chance to prove in their interested field to grow and make their parents and teachers proud on them. For example, in foreign countries schools focus on more practical work than studying and students learn about pratical skills and life hacks thag are useful in their domestic life.

In conclusion, formal learning is important for students for their career but practical activities are also important students for their mental health and physical.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement and the importance of play. The position is clear from the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. For instance, the argument about 'creativity' and 'brain work' is stated but not fully explored with specific, concrete examples. The mention of 'foreign countries' is too vague to serve as a strong supporting example. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed explanations and specific, real-world examples to support your claims, rather than relying on general statements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the flow between sentences is slightly disjointed. For example, the transition between the benefits of sports and the mention of 'focusing skills' could be smoother. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, which affects the overall cohesion of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks range and precision. There are several spelling errors (e.g., 'learing' instead of 'learning', 'pratical' instead of 'practical', 'benifical' instead of 'beneficial', 'thag' instead of 'that'). The word choice is often repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'focus' and 'important'. To improve, you should aim to use a wider variety of vocabulary, including less common lexical items and more precise collocations, while ensuring that your spelling is accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Examples include 'teachers more focus on formal learing' (incorrect word order), 'To being with' (incorrect prepositional phrase), and 'it become students more creative' (incorrect verb form). Punctuation is also inconsistent, such as the unnecessary period in 'Furthermore.,'. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence construction prevents a higher score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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