Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe that primary institutions focus too much on formal learning for students. That is good for young generations to learn things formally from tart of their studies but I also believe that sports are also important as studies.

Science has proved that students who learn things effectively from an early age are more successful and confident than who later starts everything as he grew up. At primary schools students are mostly funder grade five or six or may be grade four students it is soft part of children's life in this part he learns many good things that last in his whole life and if they are not cared well may indulge in bad habits. So, maintaining a formal environment of learning things effectively and implement in daily life.

However, some of past scientists and health specialists recommends that learning things in comfortable zone lasts greater impact on students life. They recommends teaching things to students while they are playing that builds interest in their minds and remove any doubt in their hearts about teachers and school. Furthermore, it is highly observed that under pressure studies for a long time harms domain of mind and make student depressed. it is essential to give a free game lecture after a busy day for students to relax.

In conclusion to conclude that, students should include a playing time to remove stress and inhale some fresh air and exhale all their pressure and things that feel uncomfortable and a chance to become friendly with his fellows and teachers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development is inconsistent. While you provide a clear stance, some arguments are under-developed or lack clarity, such as the vague reference to 'past scientists' and the somewhat repetitive explanation of why play is beneficial. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single, well-supported idea. The conclusion is also slightly repetitive in its phrasing, which limits the depth of the final summary.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'In conclusion to conclude that' is redundant and awkward. Additionally, the transition between ideas within paragraphs is sometimes abrupt, such as the jump from 'science has proved' to the specific age groups of students. Improving the variety and precision of linking words (e.g., 'consequently', 'furthermore', 'in contrast') would significantly improve the flow and logical progression of your arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on simple, repetitive phrasing like 'learn things' and 'good things'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'inhale some fresh air and exhale all their pressure', which is non-idiomatic. To improve, focus on using more academic and precise terminology related to education and child development. While your meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety in word choice prevents the essay from demonstrating a more sophisticated command of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede readability. For instance, 'than who later starts everything as he grew up' is grammatically incorrect. You also struggle with subject-verb agreement and pronoun usage (e.g., 'they are not cared well' and 'his fellows'). Punctuation is often missing or misused, particularly with run-on sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that your verb tenses remain consistent throughout the response.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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