Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Some people believe that primary schools give too much importance to formal learning. To a large extent i agree with this view because study is important for children but i also believe that playing is necessary for their overall development.

Firstly, formal education is important for young children. They need to learn basic subjects such as reading, writing and mathematics. These skills are necessary for their future education and career. These skills helpful for their Carrer opportunity and also for their dream job. In addition, classroom learning helps children develop concentration, discipline and good study habits. However, if children spend too much time on studying, they may become bored and tired. For example, doing too much homework every day can reduce their interest in learning.

On the other hand, play is also very important in primary school. Physical activities help children stay healthy and active. Playing with other children also improves their communication and teamwork skills. For example, team games like football can teach children how to cooperate, follow rules and solve problems together. furthermore, creative games can improve children's imagination and confidence.

In my opinion, schools should provide a balance between formal education and play. Children should have enough time to study, but they should also have regular breaks and opportunities for outdoor and creative activities. Teaches can even use educational games to make leaning more enjoyable.

In conclusion, formal leaning is necessary for children, but play is equally important for their physical, social and mental development. Therefore, primary schools should maintain a healthy balance between study and play.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have addressed all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position on the balance between formal learning and play. Your ideas are relevant and logically extended, such as the mention of teamwork and problem-solving through football. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are more deeply explored; for instance, you could elaborate on how 'formal learning' specifically impacts a child's long-term cognitive development versus the immediate benefits of play. The structure is sound, and the response maintains a consistent focus on the prompt throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and you use transition signals like 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' effectively to guide the reader. However, some cohesive devices are used in a slightly mechanical way. To improve, try to vary your linking phrases and ensure that referencing (e.g., 'these skills') consistently points back to the intended noun phrase without ambiguity. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and contributes to the clarity of your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'overall development', 'concentration', and 'cooperate'. However, there are some minor inaccuracies and repetitive word choices, such as 'study' and 'learning'. To achieve a higher score, aim to incorporate more precise, less common lexical items related to education and child development. For example, instead of 'study is important', you could use 'academic rigor is essential'. Additionally, ensure consistent spelling, as seen in the error 'Carrer' instead of 'career'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this level. While your meaning is always clear, there are recurring grammatical slips, such as 'These skills helpful' (missing verb 'are') and 'Teaches can even use' (should be 'Teachers'). Punctuation is generally functional, though there are minor issues with capitalization, such as the lowercase 'i' when referring to yourself. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and proofreading for small mechanical errors to ensure a higher frequency of error-free sentences.

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