Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning as well as many people also argue that children should play as well. Formal learning is very important for the children in that age but parents and the teacher should know that their play time, activities are also very much important as the formal learning.

Before the age of 10, there must be no restriction on a child because it's the phase of life that every kid must enjoy. For the children Activities, games are most important than the Formal Learning. For Example, If a kid is learning formal things and cant even get a chance to play with other kids or to interact with them, that kid is missing all that fun in his life.

Formal Learning can make a kid grow faster in life and but then the kid focus just remain on one side. A kid must play as well as he is giving time to formal activities and he must focus on this as well. By giving all the time to Formal learning can make a kid mature in early age that is not good for a kid health as well. like, in hid early age he thinks a lot, that is not good for health in that age, behave professionally, and can't focus on other activities i.e. fun, outing, travelling, feelings, etc.

In my opinion, it is very much important for a child to play as well as learn in primary school classroom. A kid must enjoy every phase of the life and should remember every part where he experienced every moment. So Other activities are as much important for children as the formal learning

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments are repetitive, and the reasoning lacks depth or specific examples. For instance, the claim that formal learning is 'not good for a kid health' is asserted without clear explanation or evidence. The position is clear, but the supporting points are underdeveloped, and the essay relies on generalisations rather than well-supported arguments. To improve, you should provide more concrete examples and elaborate on the 'why' behind your opinions to ensure a more balanced and thorough discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression within them is weak. Cohesive devices are used, but they are often mechanical or misused, such as the repetitive use of 'Formal Learning' and 'a kid'. The transition between ideas is sometimes abrupt, making the flow feel disjointed. For example, the shift from discussing the age of 10 to the health impacts of formal learning lacks a smooth connecting thought. While the paragraphing is present, the internal structure of the paragraphs needs more careful planning to ensure that each sentence builds logically upon the previous one.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, which limits the ability to convey complex ideas. Phrases like 'formal things', 'fun in his life', and 'grow faster in life' are simplistic. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or an awareness of collocation. Some word choices are imprecise, such as 'mature in early age' instead of 'prematurely mature'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary, including topic-specific collocations related to education and child development, and avoid repeating the same phrases throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'For the children Activities, games are most important than the Formal Learning' (incorrect word order and comparative structure) and 'By giving all the time to Formal learning can make a kid mature' (incorrect sentence construction). Subject-verb agreement and article usage are also inconsistent. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of grammatical slips prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic sentence structure and verb forms.

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