Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, learning in school can be challenging for many students. It is argued that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. I personally think that primary schools should focus on formal learning as well as informal learning.

Co-curricular activities are very important for students especially in the primary schools as students are still in the learning phase where their mind could be shaped by their surrounding environment in the school. Formal learning can help students academically but in primary schools where students are young co-curricular activities like sports or other activities can play a vital role in the overall development of the mind. For example, When I was in school only formal learning was given attention and other activities like sports or music were heavily ignored. I personally feel that prioritising only formal learning at the primary level could make students feel pressured.

Whereas, focusing on formal learning at the primary level can be tremendously beneficial for the students in the academic manner. But formal learning cannot make up for the lack of co-curricular activities in a student life. Formal learning is highly needed and should be prioritised but informal learning should be prioritised on the same scale as both types of learning plays a significant role in a student’s life. Both types of learning develops certain traits of the human mind.

At last, I strongly believe that formal learning with co-curricular activities is the best method of teaching at the primary level. Students must have freedom to learn anything that interests them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development is somewhat repetitive. While you clearly state your position, the arguments lack depth and specific examples. For instance, you mention that formal learning is 'tremendously beneficial' but do not explain how or why, and your personal example is quite brief. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the 'why' and 'how' of your arguments, providing more detailed illustrations of how play contributes to cognitive or social development in primary school children.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Whereas' and 'For example', to link sentences. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive, particularly the reliance on 'formal learning' and 'co-curricular activities' as the primary subjects of almost every sentence. The transition between the second and third paragraphs is a bit abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing (e.g., using pronouns or synonyms to avoid repeating the same phrases) is more fluid would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, but it is somewhat limited and repetitive. You frequently repeat phrases like 'formal learning', 'co-curricular activities', and 'primary level'. While the meaning is clear, the range of vocabulary does not demonstrate the flexibility required for higher bands. To improve, try to use synonyms or more precise academic collocations. For example, instead of repeating 'formal learning', you could use terms like 'academic instruction', 'structured curriculum', or 'didactic teaching methods'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as 'both types of learning plays' (should be 'play') and 'in a student life' (should be 'in a student's life'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation issues, such as the capitalization of 'When' after a comma. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and consistent use of possessive forms to improve accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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