Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this modern world, the learning system for primary schools has become crucial for students' future. While some individuals argue that schools should follow the formal learning method, whereas others believe playing with learning best way to educate kids. In this essay, I will present my perspectives by giving relevant examples.
To embark with, many civilians think giving education through strict environment can assist students to learn in good way. This traditional method of learning entirely based on student's education rather then other activities. Moreover, this help students to follow strict timetable and discipline throughout their life. It enhance kids self-confidence and time management skills, which are good for their secondary education.
On the other hand, informal education, such as getting education as well as playing together build students' teamwork abilities. Learners can take part in extracurriculum activities which good for their brain growth and body. Furthermore, there are some educational games which assist students to build their interest in education, such as cards games enhance kids counting skills. Story-telling section in the school increase students imagination power. Through this students spend quality time in the school and build good relationship with their teachers and class fellows. As a result, people want to follow this method to teach early education.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The essay addresses both parts of the prompt, but the development is limited due to the response being significantly under the 250-word minimum. While you present a position, the arguments remain somewhat superficial. For example, the point about 'card games' and 'story-telling' is relevant but lacks the depth required for a higher band. Because the response is only 210 words, the ideas are not fully extended or supported, which prevents a higher score. To improve, you must expand your arguments with more detailed explanations and specific examples to meet the length requirement and provide a more comprehensive analysis.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To embark with', 'Moreover', and 'On the other hand'. However, some transitions are awkward or non-standard, such as 'To embark with' (which should be 'To begin with'). The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the mechanical use of linking words makes the flow feel somewhat repetitive. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that the logical flow between sentences is more natural and less reliant on simple connectors.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision expected at higher levels. You use some relevant terms like 'extracurriculum activities' and 'time management', but there are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'civilians' (when you mean 'people' or 'educators') and 'imagination power' (which should be 'imagination' or 'creative capacity'). The range is limited, and the repetition of basic words like 'education' and 'students' restricts your ability to demonstrate a more sophisticated vocabulary. Focus on learning synonyms and collocations to enhance your lexical variety.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'method of learning entirely based on' (missing 'is'), 'this help students' (should be 'helps'), and 'extracurriculum activities which good for' (missing 'are'). Punctuation and subject-verb agreement are inconsistent throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents a higher score. You should focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly verb forms and sentence construction.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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