Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-20
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Unanimously, some people believe that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal education and that children should be given more opertunities to play. I largely agree with this view because play is essential for childrens overall development, although academic learning is also important.
On the one hand, formal learning is a very important for childrens this is a very important role in education. Primary schools provide childrens with basic knowledge and skills in subject such as mathematics, science, reading and writing. These skills lay the foundation for their future education and help them become confident learners. Therefore, academic lessons should not be completely replaced by play.
On the other hand, I believe that play is equally important for young children. Learning through play can make lessons more enjoyable and less stressful. Games and outdoor activities can also improve childrens creativity, communication skills and abiltiy to work in a team. For instance, a group game can teach children how to cooperate, follow rules and solve problems toghether. Moreover, regular physical activity can help children stay active and energetic throughout the school day. In my opinion, primary schools should strike a balance between formal education and recreational activities. Instead of spending most of the school daay sitting in classrooms, children could have lessons combined with educational games, sports, art and group activites.
In conclusion, although formal learning is necessary during primary education, I believe that play should have an important place in the classroom. A balanced education can help children learn and grow at the same time and prepare them better for their future.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position on the balance between formal learning and play. The ideas are relevant and well-supported, particularly the discussion on how play fosters social skills like cooperation and problem-solving. The argument is consistent throughout, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes the main points. To reach a higher band, the student could provide more specific examples or deeper analysis of how 'formal learning' might be adapted, rather than just stating it should be balanced. Overall, the task is fully addressed with a clear, logical development of ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the two sides of the argument. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' 'For instance,' and 'Moreover' are used appropriately to guide the reader through the text. The progression of ideas is smooth and easy to follow. While the cohesion is generally effective, it is somewhat standard; a wider variety of linking words or more sophisticated referencing could elevate the score further. The structure is clear and serves the purpose of the essay well.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is sufficient for the task and allows for clear communication. The student uses relevant topic-specific terms like 'formal education,' 'academic lessons,' and 'recreational activities.' However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'opertunities,' 'abiltiy,' 'toghether,' and 'daay.' While these do not impede communication, they are noticeable. To improve, the student should focus on accuracy in spelling and attempt to incorporate more precise or less common collocations to demonstrate a wider range. The current range is adequate but lacks the sophistication required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'formal learning is a very important for childrens' (incorrect article/preposition usage) and 'subject such as' (missing plural). Additionally, there is a recurring issue with the possessive form 'childrens' instead of 'children's.' Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear throughout, and the errors do not cause difficulty for the reader. To improve, the student should focus on subject-verb agreement, correct use of articles, and consistent application of possessive apostrophes.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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