Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Few people are against with primary schools who focus more on formal learning. I strongly agree this arguement where it is important that schools should focus upon both the sides (play as well as learn) which which benefits them in their educational performances.

The primary reason for my view is that play benefits students to improve their educational performances by having some activities which help them to improve their konwledge. Furthermore, students in primary school age group varies between 5 to 10 years where such activities like play will be beneficial for their academic performance. For example, childern play cricket where they feel more compatitive with counting runns, balls or overs, this make students to improve their numerical knowledge.

Another important point to be considered is that students spent more time about 7 to 8 hours at school and nowadays they only have one or two hours to play per week and this is not enough to be refreshed. Furthermore, schools provide very less time for games at school where students will be in classes for long time period it leads to stress. For instance, we can see that students are more exited in last school hours where it indicated how stressed they are with out gamres and happiness.

In conclusion, I favour those opine that schools should focus on studies as well as games where it leads to a mental peace for them and have a proper gap. In addition, schools should make sure to extend the games periods and also have focus upon students in their educational requirements.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide examples like cricket to illustrate numerical learning, the explanation remains superficial. The position is clear, but the arguments could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band. For instance, the discussion on stress is relevant but lacks depth in explaining how play specifically mitigates this in a classroom setting. To improve, ensure that each supporting point is fully explored with more detailed reasoning or illustrative evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'For example', and 'In conclusion' to link ideas. However, there are instances where the flow is slightly mechanical or repetitive. The repetition of 'which which' and the phrasing 'where it indicated' suggest a need for more varied and precise linking words. Additionally, some transitions between sentences are a bit abrupt. Improving the variety of cohesive devices and ensuring they are used naturally will help the progression of your ideas feel more seamless.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'educational performances', 'numerical knowledge', and 'mental peace'. However, there are several spelling errors ('arguement', 'konwledge', 'childern', 'compatitive', 'runns', 'exited', 'gamres') and some awkward collocations, such as 'against with' and 'provide very less time'. These errors occasionally distract the reader. To improve, focus on mastering the spelling of common academic words and expanding your range of collocations to sound more natural and precise in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('students... varies', 'it indicated how stressed they are with out gamres') and awkward phrasing ('primary schools who focus'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. To progress, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly verb tense consistency and article usage. Attempting more complex sentence structures is good, but ensure they are grammatically sound before moving to more advanced forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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