Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

It is often argued that primary schools place excessive emphasis on formal academic learning. I largely agree with this view, as young children can be subjected to unnecessary academic pressure, and I believe that play should form an important part of their education because it contributes to their social, physical and cognitive development.

One reason why formal learning can be excessive at primary-school level is that young children are not necessarily suited to long periods of conventional classroom instruction. Spending much of the school day memorising information, completing worksheets and preparing for tests can reduce their enthusiasm for learning and limit opportunities for creativity. Moreover, excessive academic pressure may cause stress at an age when children should be developing confidence and curiosity. For example, a primary-school student who is constantly required to complete homework and prepare for examinations may achieve good grades but have little time to explore hobbies, interact with classmates or develop independent interests.

Play, by contrast, provides numerous benefits that formal lessons alone cannot offer. Through games and group activities, children can develop communication, teamwork and problem-solving skills while also improving their physical coordination. Imaginative play is particularly valuable because it encourages children to experiment and think creatively. Furthermore, play does not necessarily have to be separate from education. Teachers can incorporate educational games, puzzles, role-playing and outdoor activities into lessons, allowing children to acquire academic knowledge in a more engaging way. For instance, a mathematics teacher could use games involving numbers or shapes to help young learners understand basic concepts without making the lesson feel like a formal examination.

In conclusion, although formal academic education is essential for establishing basic knowledge and skills, I believe that primary schools can place too much emphasis on traditional classroom learning. Play is equally important because it supports children's physical, social, emotional and intellectual development. Therefore, the most effective approach would be to combine formal instruction with regular opportunities for play and creative activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response fully addresses both parts of the prompt. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout the essay. The arguments regarding the negative impact of excessive formal learning and the benefits of play are well-developed and supported with relevant examples, such as the mention of stress and the practical application of games in mathematics. The ideas are extended logically, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes your main points. You have successfully met all requirements of the task by providing a balanced and well-reasoned argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the critique of formal learning and the benefits of play is smooth. You use a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'Moreover', 'By contrast', and 'Furthermore', which help to guide the reader through your argument. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas, and referencing is clear throughout. The structure is coherent and professional, making the text easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary that is appropriate for an academic context. Phrases such as 'excessive emphasis', 'conventional classroom instruction', and 'intellectual development' show a high level of precision. You use collocations accurately and avoid repetitive language. While the vocabulary is consistently accurate and fits the topic well, it could be pushed slightly further toward more sophisticated or idiomatic academic expressions to reach the highest band, but it is certainly sufficient for a high score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The essay displays a wide range of grammatical structures, including complex sentences with subordinate clauses (e.g., 'Although formal academic education is essential...'). Your control over punctuation and sentence construction is excellent, with the vast majority of sentences being error-free. There is a natural flow to your writing, and the grammatical accuracy is consistent throughout. You demonstrate the ability to use complex structures flexibly, which is a hallmark of a high-scoring response.

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