Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argued that primary schools place excessive emphasis on structured, rigid, formal instruction. I completely agree with this view and I firmly believe that playful education is vital to the learning process as it improves children's social and motor skills.

There are mainly to indicators that early education focuses more on academic learning than hands-on activities. The ratio of classroom sessions to excursions is overwhelmingly high which means there are fewer chances for learners to do out-door activities. For example, in most primary schools, students would have one play-based activity per week compared to daily classroom sessions. Furthermore, the bulk of content in the curriculum adapted to be used in classrooms. For instance, it is highly likely that the recourses provided to science teachers only include theoretical texts rather than step-by-step activities that students themselves can engage in.

It strongly believe that playful is a crucial part of any primary school learning strategy. It is proven that early education is foundational to acquiring communication skills and the best way to maximize the chance developing such skills is through monitored group activities in which learners are split into small clusters to foster teamwork skill. Another benefit of play-bases education is it enhances children's motor skills as most informal learning setting involve moving around which make less prone to developing sedentary lifestyle when the grow up.

In conclusion,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, expressing a clear position on the focus of primary education and the importance of play. However, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly at 'In conclusion,'. This failure to provide a concluding paragraph significantly impacts the development of the argument. Furthermore, the word count is 228 words, failing to meet the 250-word minimum requirement. While the ideas presented are relevant, the lack of a conclusion and the insufficient length prevent the response from being fully developed, limiting the score to a 5.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. Cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore' and 'For instance' are used to link sentences. However, the abrupt ending disrupts the overall coherence of the piece. Referencing is generally clear, but the mechanical nature of some transitions and the incomplete structure prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure that each essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a finished conclusion to provide a sense of closure to the reader.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with some attempts at more specific terminology like 'sedentary lifestyle' and 'foundational'. However, there are several word-choice and form errors, such as 'to indicators' (instead of 'two'), 'playful' (used as a noun instead of 'play-based'), and 'recourses' (likely meant 'resources'). These errors do not impede communication, but they demonstrate a lack of precision. Expanding your range of collocations and ensuring correct word forms will help improve this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including 'It strongly believe' (subject-verb agreement), 'the curriculum adapted to be used' (missing auxiliary verb), and 'when the grow up' (pronoun error). While these errors are noticeable, they do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points. To reach a higher band, focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed with greater accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.