Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Some people believe that primary schools place excessive emphasis on formal learning. I largely agree with this view because academic education is important, but children also need sufficient opportunities to play and develop other essential skills.

There is no doubt that formal learning is necessary during the primary school years. Children need to develop basic abilities such as reading, writing, mathematics and general knowledge, which provide a strong foundation for their future education. Moreover, learning in a structured environment can teach children discipline, concentration and time-management skills. However, if schools focus too heavily on academic subjects, young students may experience stress and lose their natural curiosity about learning.

For this reason, play should be an important part of the primary school classroom. Playing allows children to develop social and communication skills by interacting with their classmates. For example, group games can teach them how to cooperate, share responsibilities and solve problems together. Physical activities are also beneficial because they improve children's fitness and help them maintain a healthy lifestyle. In addition, educational games can combine learning with enjoyment. A mathematics teacher, for instance, could use puzzles or team competitions to help students practise basic calculations in an engaging way.

In my opinion, the most effective approach is to maintain a balance between formal education and play. Primary school children should certainly learn essential academic subjects, but lessons should not consist entirely of textbooks, writing and examinations. A mixture of classroom learning, creative activities, games and physical exercise can make education more enjoyable and effective.

In conclusion, although formal learning is essential for children's academic development, I believe that play is equally important for their social, physical and emotional growth. Therefore, primary schools should provide a balanced combination of learning and play rather than concentrating excessively on formal education.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response fully addresses both parts of the prompt. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout the essay. Each paragraph is well-developed with relevant examples, such as the mention of group games for cooperation and the use of puzzles in mathematics. The ideas are logically extended, and you provide a balanced view that directly answers the 'to what extent' and 'how important' components of the task. The conclusion effectively synthesizes your arguments, ensuring the response is cohesive and task-focused.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, starting with the necessity of formal learning, moving to the benefits of play, and concluding with the need for balance. You use a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'Moreover', 'For this reason', 'For example', and 'In addition'. These transitions are natural and help the reader follow your argument without difficulty. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points, contributing to a smooth flow throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with precision. Phrases like 'excessive emphasis', 'structured environment', 'natural curiosity', and 'social, physical and emotional growth' are used accurately. While the vocabulary is appropriate and conveys your meaning clearly, it lacks some of the more sophisticated or idiomatic collocations that would push the score into the 8.0+ range. However, there are no errors in word choice, and the language is consistently natural and well-suited to the academic context of the task.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

The essay displays a good command of grammatical structures. You use a mix of simple and complex sentences effectively, such as the conditional structure 'if schools focus too heavily... young students may experience stress'. Punctuation is accurate, and there are no significant errors that impede communication. The majority of your sentences are error-free, and you demonstrate control over a variety of structures. To reach a higher band, you could incorporate more sophisticated complex structures or passive voice constructions to demonstrate greater flexibility.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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