Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this era, forming learning become ongoing debate among some people who belive that primary schools are too invested in formal learning, while others argue that it is pivital for pupils to play along with study in the school classroom. In my perspective, although, focusing on learning at early education is essential because childerns are in the growing stage and they pick things more easily, it is more important for them to adopt healthy habits such as play physical games.

To begin with, people who argue that formal learning is the main objective of primary schools have their own concerned but I agree with that argument. Schools are focusing on formal education because parents are more into their childerns grades rather than their play history. In addition, early education instituations are bound to provide better result for parents satisfactions. Furthermore, students are in their growing age and in that age breaket the learning skills are more active, pupils will never forget what they learn in that period. That is why grooming them with formal learning will help them a lot professionally in the future.

On the other hand, I believe that physical activities are equally essential for young people. Schools should be developed such environment in their classrooms where students can participates in games. Those games or play time will be beneficial for their mental well-being and physical health improved. For instance, a survey conduct in UK , childerns are significantly good in studies who play at school along with education than those who only focused in learning.

In conclusion, I agree with the argument that schools are into formal learning because they want childern to perform well academically and this approach help them in future professionally. Contrary, I think it is equally important for pupils to take part in play for their physical fitness and mental well-being.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat inconsistent. While you clearly state your position, the supporting arguments, such as the mention of 'parents' satisfaction' or the 'UK survey', are a bit generic and lack depth. To reach a higher band, ensure that your examples are more specific and that your reasoning is fully extended. You have maintained a clear position throughout the essay, which is a strength, but ensure that the balance between the two sides of the argument is more thoroughly explored to demonstrate a more nuanced understanding of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'To begin with', 'In addition', and 'On the other hand', to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are instances where the flow between sentences is a bit disjointed, such as the transition in the conclusion ('Contrary, I think...'). The referencing is generally clear, but improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between ideas would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'formal learning', 'mental well-being', and 'academically'. However, there are several spelling errors ('belive', 'pivital', 'childerns', 'instituations') and some awkward word choices ('play history', 'age breaket'). These errors do not generally impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your expression. To improve, focus on mastering the spelling of common academic terms and try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations to move beyond basic vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is good. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('forming learning become', 'schools should be developed such environment') and pluralization ('childerns'). Some sentences are also structurally awkward, such as 'In this era, forming learning become ongoing debate'. While these errors rarely prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they are frequent enough to keep the score in the 6.0 range. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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