Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

People believe that primary schools tend to put too much attention on formal learning. In my opinion, I agree that studying should not only be done this seriously, especially for children no matter their personality. However, it doesn't mean that we should not get rid of learning formally.

Children are not adults, and don't see the word the same as adults do. They have way more energy to spend, and it can become a big problem if they have to sit still during classes. It especially becomes a nuisance for children with an attention deficit disorder, which is, exactly why we need to be more careful about restraining our focus only on formal learning and be open minded to try out more an informal learning setting. Taking into account the quote on quote disabilities in children is a must to teach them.

It is not because we look at informal learning that we should neglect formal learning. Formal learning must still be the main area of focus for teaching. If we strive towards informal learning too much it creates chaos and once children are leaning into it they will not stop. Children need rules to behave, just like adults have to follow the laws of the country, which is, an other reason for them to have rules and be used to rules that will turn into laws later on.

To conclude, a mix of formal and informal learning is the best approach and one should not be at the cost of the other. They both work hand in hand to create a perfect harmony for children to learn effectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. You maintain a clear position throughout, advocating for a balanced approach. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding children with attention deficit disorder is a good starting point but lacks specific examples or deeper explanation of how informal learning specifically benefits them. Similarly, the point about 'rules' in the third paragraph is a bit repetitive. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully extended with concrete examples or logical consequences rather than just stating the opinion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'However', 'To conclude', and 'If we strive towards', which help the reader follow your argument. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or abrupt, such as the transition between the second and third paragraphs. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the phrase 'the quote on quote disabilities', which is informal and disrupts the flow. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence flows naturally into the next would enhance the overall coherence of the piece.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'nuisance' and 'strive towards', which are used appropriately. However, there are instances of informal or imprecise language, such as 'quote on quote' (which should be 'so-called') and 'leaning into it'. Some word choices are slightly awkward, such as 'get rid of learning formally'. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoiding colloquialisms or filler phrases that do not add value to your argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this level. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'don't see the word the same as adults do' (should be 'world') and 'an other reason' (should be 'another'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some unnecessary commas, such as in the phrase 'which is, exactly why'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and refining your control over complex sentence structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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