Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some individuals believe that primary schools concentrate too much on formal learning. I partly agree with this view because although formal learning is essential, pupils should also have sports opportunities to build their interpersonal and communication skills.

One major reason why schools exert much stress on children's traditional schooling is that younger children required to learn basic skills. Pupils have strong learning ability compared to older people. They can pick up concepts early and required to learn useful skills such as reading, writing, speaking, and mathematics. In addition, schools focus on structured learning as they can miss exam deadlines. For instance, if schools focus too much on other activities compared to formal studies, they will not be able to complete the syllabus before deadline. I partly agree with this view, as giving too much time to studies may exert pressure on students and as a result they may feel tired from their studies, and their performance may decrease.

It is crucial students must have the sports opportunities. Playing is essential for students as much as learning in classrooms because games help them to learn important skills that help them in their lives. By playing games, they gain important interpersonal skills such as confidence, communication, and critical thinking. For example, playing games in a group requires students to communicate and take actions according to the situation. Furthermore, games help them to improve their physical health. Games are the best way to keep yourself physically fit. Therefore, games are much important for students with their learning in the school classrooms.

In conclusion, although some people believe that primary schools emphasis too much on structured learning, I partly agree with this view as it helps children to learn basic skills and complete course content before deadlines, playing games are essential for students as it helps students to stay physically fit and acquire interpersonal skills.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear throughout, and the ideas are relevant. However, the development is somewhat repetitive; for instance, the argument about 'basic skills' and 'deadlines' is mentioned in the second paragraph and then restated in the conclusion. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand on the benefits of play with more specific examples or deeper analysis rather than simply listing them. The ideas are generally well-supported, but the depth of exploration could be improved to fully satisfy the requirements for a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'For instance', 'Furthermore', and 'Therefore' are used to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with sentence-level cohesion, such as the run-on structure in the conclusion: '...playing games are essential for students as it helps students to stay physically fit and acquire interpersonal skills.' Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that sentences flow more naturally into one another would enhance the overall coherence of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There is some attempt to use topic-specific language like 'interpersonal skills', 'structured learning', and 'syllabus'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is noticeable repetition of basic words like 'important' and 'skills'. Some word choices are slightly awkward, such as 'exert much stress' (usually 'place emphasis on') and 'much important' (should be 'very important' or 'crucial'). Expanding your range of synonyms and collocations would help elevate the lexical score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('younger children required to learn' instead of 'are required') and awkward phrasing ('It is crucial students must have'). There are also some punctuation and structural errors, such as the comma splice in the conclusion. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher band score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and refining complex sentence construction will be beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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