Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

I my perspective formal learning in schools are very important because formal learning is structured and organised planning it helps children to have better education it helps children to go through proper plans and procedures which leads to proper growth students can learn more and have better future for example if a student get higher Marks in maths so through formal planning he or she will then get reward

Moreover i also think that playing also plays crucial role in children life as playing should be a part of their childhood it improves their health mental state only studying is not enough playing make them physically and mentally fit they make new friends ,after a stressful study they need to feel relaxed so playing is important. many students also get opportunities to play at national level for example cricket badminton it mainly become their hobby and their source to earn money

So lastly in my opinion both learning and playing is very crucial in children life both should be balanced and proper for instance if children take classes they also need break where they can relaxed their minds and have their lunch after that they should continue their studies in a day and parents and teachers plays very important part while guiding children when to study and play many parents only focus on studying so this has negative effect on children life and teachers should also guide students how to make their life better moreover parents and teachers also need to help children to choose their career paths

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development is limited. The ideas are presented in a somewhat repetitive manner, and the support provided—such as the example of getting higher marks in maths—is quite simplistic. To reach a higher band, you need to extend your arguments with more depth and provide more sophisticated examples. The position is clear, but the overall analysis lacks the nuance expected at higher levels. The essay is somewhat brief in its exploration of the balance between play and formal education.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into three paragraphs, which is a logical structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is very basic and often repetitive (e.g., 'moreover', 'for example', 'so'). There is a lack of sophisticated linking words to connect ideas smoothly between and within sentences. The progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the final paragraph where the transition from the importance of play to the role of parents and teachers feels abrupt. Improving the variety of transition signals and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, unified focus would significantly improve the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but remains quite basic and repetitive. You rely on simple terms like 'important', 'good', and 'better' throughout the text. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic expressions. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety in word choice limits the impact of your arguments. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to education and child development, and focus on using collocations more accurately to convey your points with greater sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, particularly regarding subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'formal learning in schools are', 'parents and teachers plays') and punctuation. There is a heavy reliance on simple sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences are often marred by run-on sentences or missing conjunctions. For instance, the lack of full stops makes some sentences difficult to follow. To improve, you should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring correct subject-verb agreement, and using punctuation to separate distinct ideas clearly rather than relying on comma splices.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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