Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern world, some individuals believe that early schools rely excessively on systematic education. Others believe that having fun with studies in the classroom can be beneficial for students' learning. This trend has become increasingly common and has attracted significant public attention. It has become a topic of widespread debate due to its impact on individuals and society. We will delve into this and extract the solution with relevant examples.

To commence, one of the major reasons is that having game in the classroom can be interested for children to understand difficult subject easily. In other word, it can help children grab complex structures easily such as math equation and English subjects. For example, some chapters of math are too difficult for children to solve their queries, so they can understand by fun activities. In 2025, Times of India news stated that 20% early schools are grabbing playing techniques to grab attention and learn more subjects to students easily. Thus, it can be beneficial for individuals and society.

Furthermore, another reason is why I support is that it can help children to grow in that particular subject and score good grades. Moreover, some individuals feel stress to teach complex queries to children, so these activities can help to understand better for parents and teachers. In addition, some students feel anxiety when they get lower grade or might be fail in exams because they can not understand properly in class. As a result, it may impact in the long term.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that primary schools should not focus only on formal learning. Although academic education is important for children, playing in the classroom is equally important because it can make learning more enjoyable and effective. Therefore, schools should maintain a proper balance between study and play.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention that play helps children understand complex subjects, the supporting points are repetitive and lack depth. For instance, the argument about 'anxiety' and 'lower grades' is mentioned but not fully explored or linked back to the benefits of play in a convincing way. To improve, ensure each paragraph provides a clear, well-supported argument rather than repeating the same general idea. The position is clear, but the supporting evidence, such as the reference to the 'Times of India', is somewhat vague and lacks a strong connection to the core argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear introduction and conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear. For example, in the second paragraph, the transition between the benefits of games and the statistics provided feels abrupt. Additionally, some sentences are slightly disjointed, which affects the overall progression of ideas. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows from the previous one to create a smoother, more cohesive argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'having game', 'grab attention', and 'understand better'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'early schools' instead of 'primary schools' or 'early childhood education'. While the meaning is clear, the lexical range is limited, and there is little evidence of less common or idiomatic vocabulary. To improve, try to incorporate more academic collocations and precise terminology related to education, such as 'pedagogical approaches', 'holistic development', or 'academic rigor', to demonstrate a more sophisticated command of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'having game in the classroom can be interested' (should be 'interesting'), 'In other word' (should be 'In other words'), and '20% early schools are grabbing playing techniques' (awkward phrasing). There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points, they are frequent enough to limit your score. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic errors like pluralization and verb forms, and practice constructing more complex sentences with greater accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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