Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

EDUCATION FRAMEWORKS PLAY A SIGNIFICANT ROLE IN SHAPING CHILDREN’S FUTURE. SOME PEOPLE CLAIM THAT PRIMARY SCHOOLS EMPHASIZE MORE ON FORMAL TEACHING. HOWEVER, I PARTIALLY ARGREE WITH THIS VIEW AS FORMAL LEARNING IS NECESSARY AS IT

LAYS DOWN THE FOUNDATION OF ANY BASE BUT DOES NOT ALLOW TO HANDLE REAL-LIFE SCENARIOS BY PRACTICAL APPLICATIONS.MOREOVER, IT IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAT

CHILDREN SHOULD STAY FOCUS ON LEARNING PROCESS WHILE ENGAGING IN PLAYING ACTIVTIES FOR ENSURING BALANCE IN THEIR LIFE.

ON ONE HAND, THEORICAL KNOWLEDGE IS ESSENTIAL FOR ACQUIRING VALUEABLE INSIGHTS OF INFORMATION. FIRSTLY, A CHILD NEEDS TO KNOW THE CONCEPTS AND ESTABLISHED THEORIES IN ORDER TO GET A GOOD UNDERSTADING OF A DOMAIN. BY GAINING THE PREVAILING FACTS ONE CAN PERCIEVE THE IN-DEPTH FLOW OF DATA. HIGHER AUTHORITES OF SCHOOL ARRANGE SEMINARS AND WORKSHOPS IN ODER TO HAVE A WIDE PERSPECTIVE OF DIVERESE TOPICS.

ON OTHER HAND, OTHER ASPECT WHICH IS PRACTICAL LEARNING CANNOT BE OVERLOOKED. ONCE A YOUNG CHILD GETS AWARE OF A WIDE RANGE OF USEFUL KNOWLEDGE THEN ONLY HE IS IN A BETTER POSITION TO IMPLEMENT THAT METHOD INTO DAY-TO-DAY LIVES. NOWADAYS, SCHOOLS ARE ORAGANISING UNIQUE WAY OF LEARNING THROUGH CONDUCTING EXPERIEMENTS, RESEARCH PROJECTS AND INTERNSHIPS FOR SOME SPECIFIC TIME PERIOD. THIS GIVES CHILDREN A CHANCE TO USE THE CONCEPTUAL EVIDENCE TO BE IMPLEMENTED TO REAL WORLD.AS A RESULT, IT CAN ENABLE TO KNOW ESSENCE AND IMPORTANCE OF FORMAL LEARNING.

IT IS ALWAYS SUGGESTED TO A BLENDED LEARNING APPROACH WHERE A CHILD CAN LEARN MEANWHILE CAN ENJOY SPORTS ACTIVITES. THIS CREATES LEARNING ENVIRONMENT BOTH PRODUCTIVE AND JOYOUS AT THE SAME TIME. PLAYING GAMES INSIDE AND OUTSIDE CLASSROM IMPROVE MENTAL AND PHYSICAL WELL-BEING.FOLLOWING SUCH A WAY, MAKE

YOUNGSTERS MORE DEDICATED TO STUDIES AND REMAIN COMPETITIVE, DESPTIE HAVING THE MONOTOUS ROLE OF ONLY STUDING AND AVOID FEELING OF BORDEMN.

TO CONCLUDE, SCHOOLS MUST INITIATE STEPS, ESPECIALLY IN PRIMARY EDUCATION WHERE LEARNING CAN BE SEEN AS ENJOYING, INTERACTIVE AND HELPFUL TO HAVE ACADEMIC EXCELLENCE AND ULTIMATELY LEAD TO A SUCCESSFUL PERSONALITY. THE PHENOMENON WILL ACHIEVE RESULTS WITH BEST POTENITAL OUTCOMES IN CHILD’S DEVELOPMENT BY ADOPTING FLEXIBLE TECHNIQUES.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. You maintain a clear position throughout, advocating for a balanced approach. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you mention 'experiments' and 'internships' as practical learning, these examples are not entirely appropriate for a primary school context, which makes the argument feel slightly disconnected from the specific age group mentioned in the prompt. To reach a higher band, ensure your examples are tailored specifically to primary-aged children rather than general educational concepts.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'On one hand', 'On other hand', and 'To conclude' to guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Following such a way, make youngsters...'. Additionally, the paragraphing is generally effective, but the flow within paragraphs could be improved by ensuring that each sentence builds more naturally upon the previous one. The use of referencing is generally clear, though some minor errors in sentence structure occasionally disrupt the logical progression.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'theoretical knowledge', 'conceptual evidence', and 'academic excellence'. However, there are several spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'AGRREE', 'VALUEABLE', 'UNDERSTADING', 'PERCIEVE', 'ORAGANISING', 'DESPTIE', and 'BORDEMN'. These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable, although they do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning. To improve, focus on proofreading for common spelling mistakes and try to incorporate more precise collocations to enhance the sophistication of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is a positive step. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with article usage ('the essence', 'the importance'), subject-verb agreement, and sentence fragments (e.g., 'Following such a way, make youngsters...'). Some sentences are also slightly awkward in their construction, such as 'This gives children a chance to use the conceptual evidence to be implemented to real world.' While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for small grammatical slips will help improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.