Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Formal learning is vital for student upbringing. Many people said that primary school are more on formal teaching style. I do agree with this point to a great extent. Second thing is that it is indispensable to play along with learning in the classroom. In my upcoming paragraphs will discuss both questions.

Firstly, on agreed side, today most of the schools more focused on formal learning. They want their students should behave well. Every child should be punctual. For example, research on different schools was done by local government in Punjab, India. They noticed that most of them focus on formal learning. more than 90% student who studied there has well knowledge and manners how to speak with senior which the researchers did not find on other who follow informal learning style. However, Informal learning is also necessary for the child future. Many institutes also focus on that. There are many student who feel monotonous while studying. With the help of digital learning a student will feel more connected. A teachers can show video to teach students.

Second topic, education and playing both are important for adolescents. To explain it, some people are not good in studies so one can pursue his future in that particular field. Many students feel bored by studying all day thus other activities are as important as learning. On the other side learning teach student how to behave.

In conclusion, majority of all students focus on formal learning. Playing and learning both are important for students.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, but the development of ideas is limited. While you state your position, the supporting arguments are underdeveloped. For instance, the example regarding schools in Punjab is vague and does not clearly link to the argument about formal versus informal learning. The second paragraph regarding the importance of play is repetitive and lacks depth, failing to fully explore why play is essential for child development. To improve, you should provide more detailed explanations and specific, well-integrated examples that directly support your main points. The conclusion is also quite brief and does not effectively summarize the main arguments presented in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow between ideas is often mechanical. You use basic cohesive devices like 'Firstly' and 'In conclusion', but the transitions between sentences within paragraphs are sometimes abrupt, making the progression of ideas feel disjointed. For example, the shift from discussing formal learning to digital learning in the first body paragraph lacks a clear logical connection. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the phrase 'the researchers did not find on other who follow informal learning style', which is grammatically awkward and confusing. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. You rely on simple, repetitive language such as 'formal learning', 'important', and 'study'. There are also instances of word-choice errors, such as 'more on formal teaching style' instead of 'focus more on a formal teaching style' and 'monotonous' used in a context that does not quite fit. To improve, try to incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary related to education, such as 'pedagogical approaches', 'holistic development', or 'extracurricular activities'. Focusing on collocations and more sophisticated synonyms will help elevate your lexical score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('primary school are', 'most of them focus'), article usage ('on other who follow'), and tense inconsistencies. Some sentences are fragmented or awkwardly phrased, such as 'Many people said that primary school are more on formal teaching style.' While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly with pluralization and verb forms, and practice constructing more complex, error-free sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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