Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many people believe that primary schools puts a lot more emphasis on textual learning rather then a playful development. I largely agree with the statement and believe that in the foundation years of children, equal focus should be given on the extracurriculars and the formal learning. More reasons for my agreement are discussed in the following paragraphs.

For children to grow, they are not just required to study basic subjects, but are also to gain insights from the outdoors. First and foremost, playfield teaches children qualities that have importance and value in real life. For instance qualities like camaraderie, leadership, ownership, communication skills etc. These skills make them ready for the upcoming world and build their character. Some of these may never develop in a classroom. Apart from this, inculcating the importance of physical activities in the foundation years leads to the importance of qualities like fitness, discipline and nature in their life.

Furthermore, true friends are made on ground. When young kids face difficult situations on pitch they learn how to tackle it and navigate through it along with support. These friends that act as pillars of support soon go on to become lifelong companions. However, the teachings taking place in a classroom are very essential in budding years as they help them lay down a path for the upcoming studies, but it is on the field where the real implementation of these learning happens.

In conclusion, learning subjects in the classroom is one of the most significant aspect during primary schooling, but it should not overshadow the playful and on-field learnings in the school. In my opinion, when provided with a balanced outlook towards classroom education and outdoor development, would bad to a fostering growth in a child's primary education.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding the focus on formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear throughout. The ideas are relevant, such as the development of 'camaraderie' and 'leadership' through play, though some points could be more deeply extended. For example, the link between classroom learning and the 'real implementation' on the field is an interesting point that could have been explored with more specific examples. Overall, the response is well-focused and meets the requirements of the task effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. Cohesive devices such as 'First and foremost', 'Apart from this', and 'Furthermore' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as the vague use of 'it' in 'learn how to tackle it'. Despite these minor issues, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate and appropriate for the task. The student uses some good collocations like 'foundation years', 'lifelong companions', and 'budding years'. There are occasional inaccuracies, such as 'textual learning' instead of 'academic learning' and the awkward phrasing 'would bad to a fostering growth', which hinders clarity. While the range is sufficient to convey the message, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. Expanding the range of academic vocabulary would improve the overall quality.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement ('primary schools puts'), incorrect comparative structures ('rather then' instead of 'rather than'), and sentence fragments or awkward phrasing in the conclusion ('would bad to a fostering growth'). While these errors are noticeable, they do not significantly impede communication. To reach a higher band, the student should focus on reducing these frequent minor errors and ensuring better control over complex sentence construction.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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