Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argued that  primary level schools are prioritizing more on formal learning. I partly agree with this opinion, as schools should focus on academic subjects, but I also believe that play should be an important part of primary education.

On the one hand, most of the primary schools are focusing more on formal learning. These schools are focusing mainly on the development of students strong educational foundation. They teach them basic skills such as reading, writing and mathematics, which prepare them for their future. For instance, a child who learns basic English at an early age will find English communication more easier in the future. Therefore, schools should focus on academic subjects of the students and help them build a good educational foundation from an early age.

On the other hand, teachers in the primary level schools should focus on the formal learning but also should not overlook their entertainment. Young children should  be nurtured with both fun and learn. These children need extra activities such as dancing, singing and other outdoor sports which help them in mental and physical development. Moreover, play can also build their confidence, communication and problem solving skills. For instance, schools could organize different competitions such as dancing, quiz and drawing in the school every weekends , which helps them to refresh.

In conclusion, it is essential for primary school to not focus too much on formal learning, rather  prioritize on both playing and learning of children equally as they can make them more physically and mentally strong.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear from the introduction and maintained throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide examples like 'reading, writing and mathematics' and 'dancing, singing', the explanation of why these are important could be more deeply explored to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, but the overall depth of the argument is more characteristic of a Band 6.0, as some points are stated rather than fully extended with detailed reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'Moreover', and 'Therefore' are used to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and there is a clear progression of ideas throughout the text. To improve, try to vary the transition signals and ensure that the relationship between sentences is more fluid rather than relying on standard linking phrases.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'educational foundation', 'formal learning', and 'mental and physical development'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'prioritizing more on' (should be 'prioritizing') and 'more easier' (a double comparative error). The range of vocabulary is sufficient but lacks the sophistication or precision required for a higher band. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding redundant intensifiers.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'most of the primary schools are focusing' (should be 'most primary schools focus'), 'fun and learn' (should be 'fun and learning'), and 'every weekends' (should be 'every weekend'). These errors are frequent but do not impede communication. To reach a higher band, you need to increase the frequency of error-free sentences and ensure better control over subject-verb agreement and pluralization. The use of complex structures is attempted, but they often contain minor errors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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