Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is argued by some people that primary schools focus too much on academic learning. I completely agree with this statement and I think that it is important for children to play as well as learn in the primary school because it will improve their physical and mental fitness.

However, others believe that primary educational institutions should only focus on formal learning, as initial years of learning prepares a base for children on which further studies are dependent on. If a child spends less time than required on academics, then his or her core subjects knowledge will not be enough. Primary schools teach subjects like Mathematics, English and Science which are very important for their life no matter what career they pursue. If they are weak in these subjects, then they would face difficulties when learning for higher education.

Having said that, in my opinion, focusing only on academic learning will cause more damage than the benefits they provide. A child without exposure to any kind of sports will never know whether they are great at any sport. If a student is talented in football but has never got much chance to play football, than his talent is wasted on academics. Cristiano Ronaldo in his interviews said that he was never good at studies. If his school had restricted him from playing sports then he never pursued football as a career. Even if a student has no goal to make a career in sports, his or her physical fitness will increase which will directly improve their health.

Therefore, it can be said that primary schools should focus not only on formal education but also on sports because it will increase career options of the children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear throughout, and the ideas are extended with relevant examples, such as the reference to Cristiano Ronaldo. However, the development is slightly uneven; the counter-argument is well-presented, but the discussion on the benefits of play could be more nuanced. While the ideas are relevant, they occasionally lean towards over-generalisation, such as the claim that a child without sports will 'never know' their potential. Overall, the task is fully addressed with a consistent viewpoint.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organised with a clear progression of ideas. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the counter-argument from the author's own perspective. Cohesive devices, such as 'However,' 'Having said that,' and 'Therefore,' are used appropriately to guide the reader. While the flow is generally smooth, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there is occasional repetition of phrasing (e.g., 'academic learning'). Nevertheless, the logical structure is sound, and the relationship between ideas is easy to follow throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning with some precision. The student uses topic-specific terms like 'academic learning,' 'formal educational institutions,' and 'core subjects.' There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, though some word choices are slightly awkward, such as 'damage than the benefits they provide' or 'learning for higher education' (instead of 'preparing for'). While the range is adequate for the task, it lacks the sophistication and natural collocation required for a higher band. Spelling is accurate throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The student demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is good control over basic grammar, and complex sentences are attempted, such as conditional clauses ('If a child spends less time...'). However, there are persistent minor errors, such as 'initial years of learning prepares' (subject-verb agreement) and 'than his talent is wasted' (incorrect usage of 'than' instead of 'then'). Despite these errors, the meaning is never obscured, and the punctuation is generally correct. The control of grammar is sufficient for a 6.5 band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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