Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
It is often contented by a section of society that primary school excessively included formal learning techniques. I firmly disagree with statement and I of opinion that play is crucial as study. The following paragraphs will elucidate the reasons behind my stance.
To begin with, it is significant to playing activities in study curriculum is beneficial for students. play stimulates neurological brain activity which enhance concentration and enjoyment in the academic performances. For instance, numerous study proved that play increases involvement in study. Conversly, overemphasis on formal led learning process , whose affect in absenteeism among children.
Furthermore, it is widely open avenue for career opportunity. Extra curriculum activities is option for follow their passion in other career build up and also improves academic score in study subjects. For example, everyone is aware about well known person M.S.Dhoni ,whose chose their sport field as well as commendable in academic performances. An emphasis on playing activity is valuable as adopted in elementary schools.
neverthless, some people opine that formal learning is vital for students to become competative and much more achievable in their life goal as primary schools foundation of the study so they believe that grater focus on theoritical learning process.
To conclude that formal learning is base for study but
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you address both parts of the prompt—the extent of agreement and the importance of play—the arguments are underdeveloped. The conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence, which prevents a clear summary of your position. To improve, you must expand on your reasoning with more detailed examples and ensure the essay is fully completed. The position is stated, but the lack of length and the abrupt ending prevent a higher score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay uses basic paragraphing and some cohesive devices like 'To begin with' and 'Furthermore'. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the text. Some transitions are mechanical, and the logical flow is disrupted by the abrupt ending. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the connection between 'formal led learning' and 'absenteeism' is not fully explained. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, finished thought will help improve the overall structure.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. There are several instances of incorrect word choice and collocation, such as 'contented by a section of society' instead of 'contended by some', and 'formal led learning process' which is awkward. You attempt to use some academic vocabulary, but the lack of precision often obscures the intended meaning. To reach a higher band, focus on using more natural collocations and precise terminology related to education, while ensuring that words are used in their correct grammatical form.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Examples include 'primary school excessively included' (tense error), 'whose affect in absenteeism' (incorrect word form/usage), and 'everyone is aware about well known person' (preposition and article errors). There is a limited range of sentence structures, and many sentences are grammatically unstable. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct preposition usage, and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed accurately without losing clarity.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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