Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There is an ongoing debate that elementary schools should pay attention more on traditional learning. Whereas, other believes that it is vital for the children to play as well as learn in the grade school. Furthermore, I will elaborate my views and opinion along with detail explanation.

Nowadays, Schools are focusing more on formal learning. This leads to lack of attention and concentration to tackle this school should encourage children to take participate in extra curriculum activities, which will help them to gain different skills. For instance, Schools should arrange an addition lecture where each student have to do some kind of activity. This will enhance students co-ordination skills as well as it will developed communication skills.

Moreover, Children should play along with studies. But it is important that schools should follow a well balanced approach rather than more focusing on studies. For example, Grade schools should focus on integrated studies with playing which will be fun for the students to learn faster. This helps students to retain and learn much more faster than the traditional method.

In contrast, many schools around the world which focus more on extra curriculum activities rather than doing enough studies. For instance, my sister is studying in Podar World School which has more activities than studies, which has significantly impacted on her studies. This approach has lead to students are not performing well in the examination due to more activities.

In conclusion, I believed that there should be balance approach between studies and extra curriculum activities. This may help students to get relaxed without harming studies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is somewhat inconsistent. While the argument for a balanced approach is clear, the supporting examples—such as the mention of the sister's school—are anecdotal and lack sufficient depth to fully explore the implications of the topic. The position is maintained throughout, but the reasoning could be more sophisticated to reach a higher band. The essay covers all requirements, but the analysis remains at a somewhat superficial level, which limits the score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Furthermore', 'For instance', and 'In contrast', though some are used mechanically or slightly inappropriately (e.g., 'Furthermore' at the start of the introduction). The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the transition between the second and third paragraphs is slightly repetitive. Referencing is mostly clear, though some sentences are disjointed, which occasionally disrupts the flow of the argument. Overall, the structure is functional and supports the reader's understanding.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. There is some repetition of basic terms like 'studies', 'activities', and 'learning'. While the student attempts to use some topic-specific vocabulary, there are errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'take participate' (should be 'participate') and 'addition lecture' (should be 'additional lecture'). The range is sufficient to convey meaning, but the lack of flexibility and the presence of minor errors in word formation prevent a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow, such as 'other believes' (should be 'others believe'), 'it will developed' (should be 'it will develop'), and 'much more faster' (a double comparative error). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency are problematic throughout the text. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of these errors indicates a lack of control over more complex grammatical forms.

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