Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There is an ongoing debate regarding the academic syllabus. A group of people argue that primary school focus more on formal learning. I partially agree to this statement and the importance of study and play are elaborated further with reasons and examples.

On the one hand, formal learning plays a crucial role in academic career for children this can improve there skills and improve there general knowledge. This is largely because subject such as Science, Math, learning English and many more can enhance there academic progress this can help to improve there knowledge for each field. Meanwhile subjects related to economics or social science can help them to know more about politics and climates. As a result this can help them in there further higher educations. For instance if a child is familiar with mathematics this can be helpful for its future as they can make their career in finance field.

On the other hand, play is also important for children as this can improve there physical strength and creativity. This is because playing as a team can improve there ability to think creative and this can also helpful for communication skills also. Whereas a child who is more involve in sports can improve there strength and there mind is also very sharped as compared to others. For example, In sports India is very famous as there children largely focus on sports.

In conclusion, and my opinion i believed there should be a balanced between both there should be equal importance for sports as well as for formal learning in academic activities. These can improved the overall academic progress.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear from the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding formal learning relies on listing subjects rather than explaining the pedagogical impact, and the example regarding India and sports is vague and lacks a clear connection to the primary school classroom context. To improve, you should provide more specific, well-reasoned explanations for your claims rather than relying on general statements. Overall, the response covers the requirements but lacks the depth expected for a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion', which helps the flow of the argument. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear (e.g., 'these can improved' in the conclusion). Additionally, some sentences are repetitive in structure, which affects the overall progression. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that pronouns clearly refer back to the intended nouns to improve the cohesion between sentences.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the message to be conveyed clearly. However, there is a lack of flexibility and precision. You rely on basic terms like 'improve' and 'important' repeatedly throughout the text. There are also noticeable errors in word choice and form, such as 'there skills' instead of 'their skills' and 'sharped' instead of 'sharpened'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a broader range of topic-specific vocabulary and ensure correct word forms. Avoid repeating the same basic verbs and adjectives by using synonyms and more sophisticated collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with homophones ('there' used instead of 'their' throughout the text) and verb forms ('these can improved'). Subject-verb agreement and article usage are also inconsistent. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be distracting. To improve, you need to proofread your work specifically for common grammatical slips and work on mastering complex sentence structures, such as using relative clauses or conditional sentences more accurately.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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