Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is argued by many that primary schools focuses tremendously on only formal learning where students cannot play that much which may affect their growth as well as mental development. This essay is going to partially agree.

On the one hand, by learning formally children can secure their future and see themselves in their full potential. As the previous times, if the little ones are learning formally then their parents would also be proud of them. For instance, if a students were to study diligently in primary school then in secondary schools it would be much easier for them to study and also to keep up with the study materials.Therefore, it is also a form of self discipline.

On the other hand, it is also important to play and not focus too much on studying. It helps in mental development as well as in physical development. For example, if a student spends too much time on studying then he\she would be limited to the outside world. They wont be able to have life experience. Consequently, it can affect their mental, physical and social well being.

In my opinion, it is much better if students can manage their time properly and mix both of them. Studying while playing can help them relax their mind, relieve stress and also help them concentrate in their studies more efficiently. It helps them to stay productive, disciplined and organized.

In conclusion, education should be maintain properly in primary schools when the minds of children are still fresh. While it is important to focus on learning it is also important to play sometimes as it helps them to learn effectively and productively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear from the introduction and maintained throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument about 'securing the future' is generic and lacks specific, well-supported examples. The explanation of why play is important is also quite brief. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed reasoning and concrete examples that illustrate the benefits of play in a primary school setting, rather than relying on general statements about 'life experience'.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Consequently', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical or repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, though the flow between sentences could be smoother. For example, the transition between the benefits of formal learning and the concept of 'self-discipline' is slightly abrupt. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate, and the progression of ideas is logical enough to follow without difficulty.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'diligently', 'productive', and 'mental development'. However, the vocabulary is often repetitive and lacks the precision required for higher bands. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'education should be maintain properly' (should be 'maintained') and 'mix both of them' (which is slightly informal). To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and avoid repeating basic words like 'study' or 'learning' by using synonyms such as 'academic instruction', 'pedagogical approaches', or 'scholastic pursuits'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the quality of the writing. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('primary schools focuses', 'a students were to study'), missing articles, and awkward phrasing ('As the previous times'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are instances where commas are missing or misused. To achieve a higher score, you need to demonstrate more consistent control over complex structures and reduce the frequency of basic grammatical slips.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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