Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

I agree, the primary student is at the age of growth in this age physical activity is as important as study. When I was a kid our teacher help us in our study as much as they gave us time to play cricket, hockey. Scientific studies clear the importance of games and physical activities . I play many games when I was a kid . If students only focus on study without any activities that make him weak physically also mentally .We need balance between them because both are important for a student . Today in our society primary schools do not focus on physical activities that make student demotivated along study . We need to add game period at the routine that make student fresh so they respond better also at study . Many years ago when I was a kid my bestfriend that goes different school he told me about the their school the teacher did not focus on his physical activities so the student barely focus on their studies

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 172 words. This significantly limits the development of your ideas. While you address both parts of the prompt—agreeing that schools focus too much on formal learning and explaining the importance of play—the arguments are underdeveloped and lack sufficient detail or examples. The response reads more like a brief personal reflection than a structured academic essay. To improve, you must expand your points with more depth, provide clearer explanations, and ensure you meet the length requirement to allow for a full discussion of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. There is no introduction or conclusion, and the entire response is presented as a single, dense paragraph. The progression of ideas is disjointed, and the use of cohesive devices is very limited. For instance, phrases like 'When I was a kid' are used repetitively to start sentences, which makes the flow mechanical. To achieve a higher band, you need to organize your writing into distinct paragraphs (introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion) and use a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') to connect your ideas logically.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive. You frequently use simple words like 'study', 'games', and 'kid'. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or an awareness of academic style. Phrases such as 'make him weak' or 'respond better also at study' are awkward and lack precision. To improve, focus on learning collocations and more sophisticated vocabulary related to education and child development. For example, instead of 'study', use 'academic curriculum' or 'formal instruction'. Expanding your range of vocabulary will help you express your ideas more clearly and professionally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'our teacher help us'), article usage, and sentence structure (e.g., 'my bestfriend that goes different school'). Many sentences are run-on or fragmented, such as 'Today in our society primary schools do not focus on physical activities that make student demotivated along study.' You rely almost exclusively on simple sentence structures. To improve, you should practice using a mix of complex and compound sentences and pay closer attention to basic grammar rules, such as pluralization and verb tense consistency.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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