Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
These days some people seem to argue that primary schools should emphasis on formal ways of learning. On the other hand, others believe that schools must need to include multiple playing activities in the classroom along with their formal teaching style. However, I agree to a great extent with the idea that primary schools focus on various playing activites in the classroom which can help student to polish their skills. There are certain reasons of my opinion which i wish to highlight in this essay.
In the first place, it would be quite true to say that traditonal ways of learning are undoubtedly help children to strong their academic skills in different subjects. One illustration for this is that, reading, writting and mathematic skills are improved which is essential for their whole academic career. Another major advantage of this side of topic seem to be that, homework and assingment are given by the teachers make children discipline and being consistent in class. In result of that children get high grades in the final exam result.
To put this issue into perspective, the third most important point which is worth considering is that playing games and participating in activities are also crucial for primary children school by which they learn team cordination skills, take responsibilities in group activities, and communication skills which make their academic lessons more enjoyable. To say futher one factor that needs consideration would be that participating in entertainment learning bring childrens close to eachother and eventually this cordination turn out into friendship for life. This friendship works for both in variour path of their lifes For Instance, finding a better job in future, share ideas with eachother, set goals together.
In conclusion, I am convinced to say that it is indeed a debatable issue which need further discussion. However, in the light of above-discussed arguments and example it would quite safe to conclude that the advantages of formal learning with several playing activities over weigh its disadvantages in many aspects.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, acknowledging the debate around formal learning and arguing for the importance of play. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the benefits of formal learning are mentioned, the explanation of 'discipline' and 'consistency' is a bit generic. The section on play is better supported with specific outcomes like 'team coordination' and 'communication skills'. To reach a higher band, the student should provide more nuanced examples of how these two approaches can be balanced in a modern classroom, rather than just listing general advantages.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In the first place', 'Another major advantage', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive, and there are instances where the flow is interrupted by awkward phrasing, such as 'To say futher one factor that needs consideration'. The use of referencing is generally clear, but the connection between sentences could be smoother to improve the overall progression of ideas.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the student to express their ideas clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific language like 'academic skills', 'team coordination', and 'formal learning'. However, there are several instances of incorrect word choice or collocation, such as 'emphasis on' instead of 'emphasize', 'strong their academic skills' instead of 'strengthen', and 'entertainment learning'. These errors do not impede communication, but they limit the score as the range is not yet flexible or precise enough for a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('homework and assingment are given... make children discipline'), incorrect verb forms ('are undoubtedly help'), and punctuation/article errors. While the student attempts complex sentences, these often contain errors that distract the reader. To improve, the student should focus on basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement, as these errors occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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