Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Recently,many elementary schools are looking a formal study and high grades. I agree that many of the school nowadays less teachers and limited learning sources to teaching to the childrens. It's very important to playing physical activities to improve they ability and focused in study.

On the One hand most of school are nowadays to teaching methods are very limited and memorize questions to students.They are only focus on high grades and very less at teaching staff and students don't have any practical and theoretical knowledge about the subject .Moreover there try to School publicity throughout the students grades.

For example,many are focus on students garde not student intrest and ability. To shown practice experience and theoretical division are important to students study it's help to more understanding way in children's.

On the other hand physical activities are more important to classes, Because of students health properly well they are try study well .Schools play grounds are very less and not school time table and staff support to encourage to students playing games.For instances people are high grades school are never win physical activities related games.so children don't focus on there study's and drop there confidence.

I my opinion increase teachers and explain very things in practical terms and give they to time to actively participated in physical activities.

In conclusion,I believe increase school faculty and give practical and theoretical knowledge to childrens and gave to time to childrens playing physical activities it will be there ability and focus on study's.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, acknowledging the focus on formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments regarding school facilities and teaching methods are repetitive and lack specific, well-supported examples. The position is clear, but the explanation of 'why' and 'how' remains superficial. To improve, you should expand on the benefits of play for cognitive development or social skills rather than focusing solely on the lack of playgrounds. The response is somewhat underdeveloped, which prevents it from reaching a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the progression of ideas is often disjointed. While some cohesive devices like 'Moreover' and 'In conclusion' are used, they are sometimes applied mechanically or incorrectly. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'Moreover there try to School publicity throughout the students grades,' where the connection to the previous point is lost. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, often relying on basic terms like 'study', 'grades', and 'important'. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'looking a formal study' instead of 'focusing on formal education' and 'students health properly well'. Some phrases are difficult to interpret due to incorrect word forms, such as 'theoretical division' instead of 'theoretical knowledge'. To achieve a higher score, you need to expand your range of vocabulary to include more precise academic terms and ensure that words are used in their correct collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'many of the school nowadays less teachers'), incorrect verb forms, and missing articles. Sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at complex sentences are often marred by errors, such as 'Because of students health properly well they are try study well'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. You need to focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors in tense and pluralization.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.