Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Today, many primary schools place a strong emphasis on traditional, formal learning. While this structure helps children prepare for future academic challenges, I agree that schools focus too much on desk-work. I firmly believe that allowing children to play in the classroom is just as important as formal education for their healthy growth.

Clearly, structured lessons help young students build essential life skills. As educational standards rise, formal rules teach children how to behave appropriately around teachers and classmates. For example, following a structured school routine teaches young learners discipline, which is highly useful when they transition to high school or future jobs. However, when schools focus strictly on textbooks and exams, it puts a heavy mental burden on young pupils.

At the same time, allowing time for play is necessary to protect a child's mental health and keep them motivated. Early childhood should be a time for fun, and too much academic pressure can make children dislike school entirely. Educational studies show that children actually learn much faster when lessons include games. For instance, research comparing traditional teaching with play-based methods found that students who learned through games understood concepts more quickly. They were also much better at coming up with creative ideas than those who only sat at desks.

In conclusion, although formal teaching is necessary to build discipline and basic skills, focusing on it exclusively places too much stress on young minds. A balanced approach that blends learning with play is a much better choice because it makes education both effective and enjoyable for young children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response fully addresses both parts of the prompt. You clearly state your position in the introduction, agreeing that there is too much focus on formal learning and arguing for the importance of play. Each body paragraph develops these ideas logically. You provide relevant examples, such as the mention of discipline in formal settings and the reference to educational studies regarding play-based learning. The ideas are well-extended, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes your arguments. The response is balanced and directly answers the 'to what extent' and 'how important' components of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the benefits of formal learning and the necessity of play is smooth. You use a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'While this structure helps', 'For example', 'At the same time', and 'In conclusion'. These markers guide the reader through your argument without being repetitive or mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, the two main arguments, and the conclusion, ensuring a coherent structure throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with precision. Phrases like 'place a strong emphasis', 'essential life skills', 'mental burden', and 'play-based methods' show a good command of topic-specific language. While the vocabulary is accurate and natural, it stays within a relatively standard range. To reach a higher band, you could incorporate more sophisticated or idiomatic expressions to add nuance to your arguments. However, the current range is more than adequate for the task, and there are no errors in word choice that impede communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The essay displays a good variety of complex sentence structures, such as the use of concessive clauses ('Although formal teaching is necessary...') and conditional-like structures ('when schools focus strictly on...'). The majority of your sentences are error-free, and your control over punctuation is excellent. There are no significant grammatical slips that distract the reader. The grammar is consistent and supports the clarity of your arguments well. You have demonstrated a solid grasp of both simple and complex forms, which is appropriate for this level.

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