Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Today, many primary schools place a strong emphasis on traditional, formal learning. While this structure helps children prepare for future academic challenges, I agree that schools focus too much on desk-work. I firmly believe that allowing children to play in the classroom is just as important as formal education for their healthy growth.

Clearly, structured lessons help young students build essential life skills. As educational standards rise, formal rules teach children how to behave appropriately around teachers and classmates. For example, following a structured school routine teaches young learners discipline, which is highly useful when they transition to high school or future jobs. However, when schools focus strictly on textbooks and exams, it puts a heavy mental burden on young pupils.

At the same time, allowing time for play is necessary to protect a child's mental health and keep them motivated. Early childhood should be a time for fun, and too much academic pressure can make children dislike school entirely. Educational studies show that children actually learn much faster when lessons include games. For instance, research comparing traditional teaching with play-based methods found that students who learned through games understood concepts more quickly. They were also much better at generating creative ideas than those who only sat at desks.

In conclusion, although formal teaching is necessary to build discipline and basic skills, focusing on it exclusively places too much stress on young minds. A balanced approach that blends learning with play is a much better choice because it makes education both effective and enjoyable for young children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt clearly. You establish a firm position in the introduction, agreeing that there is too much focus on formal learning and arguing for the importance of play. The ideas are well-developed, particularly the discussion on mental health and the benefits of play-based learning. You provide relevant examples, such as the comparison between traditional and play-based methods, which supports your argument effectively. The conclusion reinforces your position well. To reach a higher band, you could expand slightly more on the 'formal learning' aspect to ensure the balance of the essay is perfectly symmetrical, but overall, the task is fully addressed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the benefits of formal learning and the necessity of play is smooth. You use a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'While this structure helps', 'At the same time', and 'For instance'. The paragraphing is logical and contributes to the overall clarity of the argument. The flow is natural, and the reader is guided through your reasoning without any confusion. The use of referencing is precise, making the text easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary that is appropriate for an academic context. Phrases like 'place a strong emphasis', 'mental burden', and 'generating creative ideas' show a good command of collocation. The vocabulary is precise and helps convey your meaning clearly. While the range is sufficient and accurate, incorporating a few more sophisticated or less common lexical items could elevate the score further. However, there are no significant errors in word choice, and the language used is natural and fits the tone of the essay well.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The essay displays a good variety of complex sentence structures, such as the use of subordinate clauses ('Although formal teaching is necessary...') and conditional-like structures. The majority of your sentences are error-free, and your control over punctuation is excellent. There are no major grammatical slips that impede communication. The grammar is consistent throughout, and you demonstrate the ability to use different sentence types to maintain interest and clarity. The writing is polished and shows a high level of accuracy, which is consistent with a strong performance.

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