Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.
To what extent do you agree with this opinion?
How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It is often argued that primary schools places too much focus on formal learning, while children should also get enough opportunities for playing. I partly disagree with this opinion because formal education are very important for children, however, I also believe that playing is an important part of their development.
The main reason why formal learning is important in primary schools is because children needs to learn basic skills from an early age. Subjects such as reading, writing and mathematics provides a strong foundation for their future education. If children does not receive proper classroom education, they may face difficulties in their higher studies. For example, students who practises reading and mathematics regularly can perform better in secondary school. Therefore, formal education should be a major part of primary education.
However, playing is also very important for young children because it help them to develop many other skills. When children plays with their classmates, they learn how to communicate and work together. Physical games also improves their health and makes them more active. For instance, children who participate in team games can learns sharing, cooperation and other social skills. Playing is not only useful for physical development, but it also make children mentally relaxed. This can help them to concentrate better when they are studying in the classroom.
In conclusion, I disagree that primary schools should focuses too much on formal learning. Although academic education are necessary for developing basic knowledge, children should also has enough time for playing. A balance between classroom learning and play are the best approach for children's overall development.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear from the introduction and maintained throughout. Ideas are relevant, such as the need for foundational skills and the social benefits of play. However, the development is somewhat repetitive, and the arguments could be extended with more specific examples or deeper analysis to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, ensuring the task requirements are met.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph has a central topic, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. Cohesive devices such as 'The main reason', 'However', 'For instance', and 'In conclusion' are used effectively to link ideas. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the transition between the importance of formal learning and the benefits of play could be smoother. Overall, the text is coherent and easy to read.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the student to express ideas clearly. There is some attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'foundational skills', 'social skills', and 'mentally relaxed'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic verbs and adjectives. To improve, the student should incorporate more precise academic collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing. The current level is sufficient to convey meaning without difficulty, but lacks the sophistication required for higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent subject-verb agreement errors throughout the text, such as 'primary schools places', 'children needs', 'subjects... provides', 'children does not', and 'children plays'. These errors are persistent and occur in almost every paragraph. While the meaning is never obscured, the frequency of these basic grammatical slips prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. More attention to singular/plural agreement is necessary.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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