Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Many believe that primary schools rely heavily on formal education, while physically based learning is gaining more attraction in younger minds in the modern era. It is important for primary school students to have balanced learning; hence, I agree that formal learning is taught more than play-based learning, but play-based learning leads to child development.

Firstly, primary schools evaluate students based on their academic curricula over skill based learning; this creates an unfair advantage for naturally skilled children who are weak in academics. Primary schools tend to train young minds to spend hours sitting at desks completing academic tasks for better marks or to read textbooks. Ultimately, this technique causes stress at a very young age and leads to reduced motivation or lack of interest. This is the main reason for children to lose interest in studies, and it makes them fall behind in class in the long run.

Hence, it is important to maintain balance and to include fun, play-based learning activities. Incorporating play is critical for cognitive, social and emotional growth. It showcases some real-life aspects that children encounter when growing up and prepares them for the challenges they face in the future. For instance, ATLAS is a game where kids have to name different places in the world with the last letter of the previous place; this creates a more fun way to include geography in their studies. Interactive play also teaches children skills needed in the real world, such as negotiation, social skills, emotional skills, etc.

In conclusion, primary schools place too much focus on standard desk learning, which can cause young students to feel stressed and lose interest in school. Incorporating play-based learning alongside normal lessons is essential because it builds key social and thinking skills. Primary education should use a balanced approach that combines regular lessons with fun, interactive play to help children grow.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position on the focus of primary education and justifying the importance of play. Your ideas are relevant and logically developed. For example, you explain the negative impact of desk-based learning on motivation and provide a concrete example of how play (the ATLAS game) can facilitate learning. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are fully extended; for instance, you could further elaborate on how 'negotiation' and 'social skills' are specifically fostered in a classroom setting to provide more depth to your analysis.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Hence', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader through your argument. The progression of ideas is smooth, moving from the problem of over-formalization to the benefits of play. To improve, ensure that your referencing is always precise; for example, in the second paragraph, the phrase 'this technique' refers back to the previous sentence, which is good, but ensure that all transitions between sentences are equally fluid to avoid a slightly mechanical feel.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with some precision. Phrases like 'academic curricula', 'cognitive, social and emotional growth', and 'balanced approach' are used effectively. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'gaining more attraction' (should be 'gaining more traction' or 'becoming more popular') and 'standard desk learning' (which is understandable but slightly unnatural). Expanding your range to include more sophisticated collocations would help elevate your score further.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, and your meaning is consistently clear. There are some minor grammatical slips, such as 'the main reason for children to lose interest' (better as 'the main reason children lose interest') and 'physically based learning' (which is slightly awkward phrasing). While you show good control over punctuation and sentence structure, increasing the variety of complex grammatical forms, such as conditional sentences or passive constructions, would demonstrate a wider range of control.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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