Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people argue that primary school focus too much on formal learning. While other believe that it is also important for children to play as well as formal learning.

Firstly, in formal learning teacher discuss about the topic with children in classroom, Although tells about advantage and disadvantage of the topic. The whole discussion held under only one roof, sometimes teacher also discuss some example related to the topics which also important for students for formal learning. Nowadays, many schools are focusing on only formal learning, which is not good for students health. They will become lazy, And this will effect their health. If primary schools will focus on formal learning in primary schools, so students just want to get rid of studies.

Secondly, In primary school children age and height is growing, so physical activities are really important for children in this stage. There should be a proper lecture for sports and games in primary school, Because by playing sports children will be fit physically. And in games we have to play with tricks this will make children brain sharp. By being active students will be able to understand topics easily in classroom. For instance, in many countries( CHINA, SOUTHKOREA and USA) there is a sports or game lecture for children.

In conclusion, we have to make primary schools interested for children, So they take interest in studies as well. If students will take interest in studies and sports, So they will enjoy school as well. And there should be some sports activities for students everyday, Although in every country. This will also help students to take interest in studies as well.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is limited. While you mention that formal learning can lead to students becoming 'lazy' or wanting to 'get rid of studies,' these points are not fully explored or supported with depth. The position is clear, but the arguments remain somewhat superficial. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific, nuanced examples and elaborate on the psychological or educational benefits of play beyond just physical health, ensuring the link between your arguments and the prompt is consistently maintained.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, the use of 'Although' at the beginning of sentences (e.g., 'Although tells about advantage...') is grammatically incorrect and disrupts the flow. Transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt, and the referencing is occasionally unclear. While there is an overall progression, the lack of sophisticated linking words and the repetitive nature of some sentence starters make the cohesion feel somewhat basic. Improving the variety and accuracy of your transition signals will significantly enhance the readability of your work.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on simple, repetitive phrasing such as 'discuss about the topic' and 'take interest in studies.' There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'make children brain sharp' instead of 'sharpen children's cognitive abilities.' While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of less common lexical items and the presence of errors in word formation (e.g., 'effect' instead of 'affect') limit the score. Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic collocations would be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentences, but accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'teacher discuss,' 'children age and height is growing') and punctuation, particularly the misuse of capital letters and commas. The sentence structure is often fragmented or run-on, which hinders clarity. For instance, 'If primary schools will focus on formal learning in primary schools, so students just want to get rid of studies' is grammatically awkward. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that complex structures are used with greater precision.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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