Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people believe that elementary schools concentrates more on formal learning whereas other argue that playing is as vital as learning in school. I firmly agree with this opinion because playing not only helps in physical heath but also in mental health.

It is often said that pupils should focus more on their academic journey from their primary school because it will facilities in memorising text. Owing to this it is also believed that students should be preparing for high school from nursery therefore tutors and academic organisations are making them study hard giving them less time to play; for example, if young children play more and had less time for study this will determintcail for their higher studies due to this teachers are keen on formal learning with assignments exams and class room tests.

Many people think that learning should be fun this will help a child focus more on studies as well as he will catch difficult words easily. For example, a teacher has given an assignment of making painting with numerical letters to students which require them to work in a group to finish the test hence by this will help them improve their mental health along with they can built their communication and leadership skills, however through this pupils make their friendship even more stronger by working together.

In conclusion, I agree with the idea of letting learners play while they are learning is beneficial to their mental being and this can improve their learning as well, however focusing more on formal learning can be hard for young minds to study more carefully.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While the position is clear, the explanation of why formal learning is perceived as necessary is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. The argument regarding the benefits of play is better supported with an example, but the connection between the example and the broader academic argument could be more explicit. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph provides a more balanced and nuanced exploration of the topic rather than relying on generalisations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Owing to this', 'For example', and 'In conclusion', though some are used mechanically or slightly inaccurately (e.g., 'hence by this will help'). The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the transition between the discussion of formal learning and the benefits of play could be smoother. Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph, which makes the flow of the argument feel slightly disjointed at times.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of word-choice errors and non-standard collocations, such as 'determintcail' (likely intended as 'detrimental'), 'facilities in memorising', and 'mental being'. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of sophisticated vocabulary and the presence of spelling errors (e.g., 'determintcail', 'class room') limit the score. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and ensuring correct word forms are used in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('elementary schools concentrates'), incorrect verb forms ('if young children play more and had less time'), and awkward phrasing ('by this will help them'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly regarding the use of commas to separate clauses. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would be highly beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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