Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argued that primary schools place too much emphasis on formal learning, leaving children with limited opportunities for play and practical activities. I strongly agree with this opinion because excessive academic learning affects their physical development and creativity.

To begin with, one of the main reasons why I completely agree with this view is that too much formal learning can put unnecessary pressure on children which make them feel stressed and lose interest in learning. Because at the primary school level children used to get enough time to play and enjoy some physical activities but now from this level children just memorizing the syllabus which is directly affects their overall development. They don't even get time to play with their parents; they just came back home from schools straightway they go for tuition because they need to complete their burdened homework which make them sick and lost sometimes.

Another significant reason for my opinion is that children develop important skill through playing games in a group, they will learn communication, teamwork skills and creativity. Moreover, Playing makes them active, and they use their own mind without any memorization. Children will not learn all these abilities from studying. To learn more than academics they need to interact with other children. these skills are also important for their overall development.

In conclusion, I completely agree with view, Formal learning pressure is not good for primary school children, it will completely affect their mental and physical development also they are missing out on learning skills. Educational department should look into this and take a major step to make study balanced; they need to add some sports lectures with academic learning.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive. For instance, the argument about 'stress' and 'lack of time' is mentioned in the second paragraph and then echoed in the conclusion without adding significant new depth. While the ideas are relevant, they could be more fully extended with specific examples or more nuanced explanations to reach a higher band. The response is consistent in its focus, but the supporting arguments remain at a general level.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'Another significant reason', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'they just came back home from schools straightway they go for tuition'. Additionally, the use of referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the third paragraph where 'these skills' refers back to a list of items that could be more tightly linked. Overall, the progression of ideas is coherent, but the flow between sentences could be smoother.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their opinion clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'formal learning', 'academic learning', and 'overall development'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of imprecise word choice or awkward phrasing, such as 'make them sick and lost sometimes' or 'sports lectures'. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the message, but it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the fluency of the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('children used to get', 'which make them feel'), tense inconsistencies ('they just came back home'), and punctuation errors, such as comma splices ('in a group, they will learn'). These errors are noticeable and occur throughout the text, although they do not completely impede communication. A greater focus on sentence construction and proofreading for basic errors would improve the score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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