Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, primary schools focus too much on formal learning has become a widely discussed issue in many countries . I partly agree with this view because academic education is important, but children also need enough time to play and develop other essential skills.

Firstly, formal education essential for young children because it provides them with a strong educational foundation. Through subjects included science, mathematics, English, children can gain knowledge and improve their academic abilities. Moreover, classroom learning helps them develop concentration, discipline and problem solving skills.

On the other hand, it is also important to consider the negative viewpoint. Some people believe that formal learning at negative effect on children. Children spending too much time on studies may causes stress and boredom, and it can reduce the interest in education. Other peoples believe that children need opportunities to relax and express their creativity. Therefore, schools should not focus only on books, classwork, tests and homework. Teachers should also focus all students in classroom and check the interest of children in studies.

Looking further, although this arguments has some merit , I would believe that formal education is necessary for primary school children, but it should not relative to their education. And I argue that playing equally important for the overall development of children. Physical activities can improve their heath, while team games can teach cooperation, communication and leadership. For instance , playing football and cricket allow children to work with other and develope social skills .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the extent of agreement regarding formal learning and the importance of play. However, the essay falls slightly short of the 250-word minimum requirement, which impacts the overall development of ideas. While the position is clear, the arguments in the third paragraph are somewhat repetitive and lack depth. The conclusion attempts to summarize the stance but contains confusing phrasing, such as 'it should not relative to their education,' which obscures the intended meaning. To improve, ensure each point is fully extended with specific examples and ensure the word count meets the minimum threshold to allow for complete idea development.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly,' 'On the other hand,' and 'For instance' are used to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is interrupted by awkward phrasing or missing articles. Referencing is generally clear, but the transition between the third and fourth paragraphs is abrupt. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices more naturally and ensure that the logical progression between sentences is smoother.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to express basic ideas. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'academic foundation,' 'discipline,' and 'creativity.' However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'formal learning at negative effect' instead of 'has a negative effect' and 'develope' (spelling error). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic descriptors. To improve, the student should focus on learning more precise collocations and ensuring accurate spelling of academic terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing articles ('included science'), subject-verb agreement issues ('studies may causes'), and incorrect word forms ('playing equally important' instead of 'playing is equally important'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, the student should focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly regarding verb tenses, articles, and sentence construction, to ensure that complex structures are formed correctly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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