Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people argue that primary schools focus too much on formal learning.

To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

How important do you think it is for children to play as well as learn in the primary school classroom?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people think that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. I partly agree with this opinion because learning is important, but children also need time for playing and other activities

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Firstly, formal learning is important for young children. At primary school, students learn basic subjects such as English, mathematics and science. These subjects give them knowledge which can help them in their future studies. For example, children need to learn reading and writing properly because these skills are useful in almost every part of life. Therefore, schools should give enough time to academic subjects

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However, I believe playing is also very important for children. Playing games can help them to stay healthy and active. It can also improve their social skills because they can communicate and play with other children. Moreover, if students study for many hours without a break, they can become tired and lose interest in learning. For this reason, schools should provide some time for outdoor games and fun activities.

In my opinion, there should be a balance between formal learning and playing. Schools should not completely focus on studies because children need to enjoy their childhood as well. At the same time, playing should not replace important subjects. Both activities can help children develop in different ways.

In conclusion, I partly agree that primary schools focus too much on formal learning. I think learning and playing are both important, and schools should give suitable time to each of t

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, providing a clear position on the balance between formal learning and play. However, the essay is slightly under the 250-word minimum, which impacts the development of ideas. While the arguments regarding academic benefits and social development are relevant, they remain somewhat superficial. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your examples with more specific detail or personal experience. The conclusion is also incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence, which prevents a fully developed final summary. Because the task was not completed in full and the word count requirement was not met, the score is limited.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the prompt. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'However', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader through your argument. While the progression of ideas is clear, the range of cohesive devices is somewhat limited and repetitive. Additionally, the abrupt ending of the final sentence disrupts the overall flow and coherence of the conclusion. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking phrases and ensure that all sentences are fully completed to maintain a professional structure.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use common academic terms like 'formal learning', 'academic subjects', and 'social skills'. However, the range is somewhat narrow, and there is a reliance on simple, repetitive phrasing (e.g., 'important', 'learning', 'playing'). There is little evidence of less common or idiomatic vocabulary. To achieve a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations related to education and child development, which would demonstrate a more sophisticated control of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a good control of basic sentence structures, and the majority of your sentences are error-free. You use a mix of simple and complex sentences, such as 'If students study for many hours without a break, they can become tired'. While there are few grammatical errors, the range of complex structures is limited. Punctuation is generally accurate, although the incomplete final sentence is a significant issue. To improve, focus on incorporating a wider variety of complex grammatical forms, such as passive voice or conditional structures, while ensuring that all sentences are fully formed and punctuated correctly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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